It came about in the eleventh month of the one-thousand nine-hundred eighty-first year of our Lord that the LORD Himself looked down, and He listened to the sounds His people made. And God said, "We have commanded them to make a joyful noise unto Us. But they have taken Our rhythms and Our progressions, Our chords and Our lyrics, Our soul and Our funk, and they have made a music which is not music. They have made a sound in their own image and a noise after the lusts of their own hearts." And the LORD was grieved by this, so He called for the Common Musica of the Denominum host. And He said, "Go forth to the Earth, for My people have made an abomination of Our gifts. Go forth, for there are two who shall be conceived this very month. And they shall be My messengers. You will abide in them, and I will abide in you. And there shall come two also who shall make themselves an all-terrain wheelchair unto our common denominators that, at the proper time, they might ride across the desert to the Temple of El Guapo, which was hidden by the enemy of My people, Carson Daily. And there I shall reveal unto them the secrets of the Lakes of Michigan, and there they shall rawk."
