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tv   Late Night With Seth Meyers  NBC  July 21, 2021 12:36am-1:36am PDT

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i just don't see you enoug i wish i saw you enough ♪ ♪ it's something in the way i feel your skin i just don't see you enoug i wish i saw you enough ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause >> jimmy: join us tomorrow night. emilia clarke and mark ronson will be here, and we have music from brandi carlile. that's tomorrow. [ cheers and applause my thanks to jonas brothers, zoe lister-jones, omar apollo. and the roots right there from philadelphia, pennsylvania [ cheers and applause thank you for watching stay tuned for "late night with seth meyers. goodnight everybody. thank you. [ cheers and applause ♪ ♪
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[ cheers and applause ♪ >> announcer: tonight on "late night with seth meyers kristin chenoweth, star of "i think you should leave," tim robinson writer simon rich, featuring the 8g band with taku hirano. and now, seth meyers >> seth: good evening. i'm seth meyers. this is "late night. and we hope you're doing well tonight. let's get to the news. according to a new book about the 2020 election, trump campaign aides intentionally gave rudy giuliani the wrong time to show up for a debate prep, though that hardly seems necessary.
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"hey boss, i'm here at the bait shop where are you guys?" amazon founder jeff bezos traveled to space today aboard his company blue origin's first manned rocket launch i'm not sure what they used to fuel the rocket, but based on the design i'm going to say two d batteries? president biden will travel tomorrow to cincinnati, ohio, which is about as impressive as what bezos did today that wasn't space, dude! in a recent interview for a new book about his presidency, former president trump said if george washington came back from the dead and picked abraham lincoln as his running mate, it would be hard for washington and lincoln to beat him in an election though i'm not sure i would maybe have beaten two zombies is the flex he thinks it is according to the latest numbers, coronavirus cases are increasing in every state but hey, if i wanted a case of corona, it'd be this one that's right if you're going to insist on not getting vaccinated and prolonging the pandemic, we're starting jokes over from the
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beginning. we're just going to cycle back to the 2019 punch lines. it'll be like groundhog day. you won't even be able to tell if it's a rerun or not okay according the latest numbers, coronavirus cases are increasing in every state wow. the only thing more dangerous than covid is carole baskin, i'm serious. that was your warning. a 20-acre mountain in switzerland is up for sale on ebay for $235 thousand, but they really hammer you on the shipping major league baseball has reportedly banned a new york yankees fan for life from every mlb ballpark after he threw a ball from the stands on saturday at a boston red sox outfielder said the yankees, "does he have a curve ball?" fox news host sean hannity told viewers on his show last night to take the coronavirus seriously. july 2021, right on time it's like if today i asked if anyone's heard of lizzo.
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check her out. a banner plane made an emergency landing yesterday on a bridge in new jersey luckily, bystanders on the ground were prepared and finally, today was world jump day and you'll probably still get higher than jeff bezos went this morning. that wasn't space, dude! and that was a monologue scollins coming after bezos's heart. we've got a great show for you tonight. she's a tony and emmy winning actress you know from "the west wing," "glee," and "wicked" on broadway she's one of the stars of "schmigadoon" on apple tv plus, kristin chenoweth will be here and i'm not exaggerating when i say the highlight of my summer has been watching and rewatching episodes of "i think you should leave" with tim robinson when i'm done watching them, i make everybody else i know watch them with me tim robinson is going to be here and he is one of my favorite comedy writers and a good friend from my snl days his latest book, "new teeth," is out july 27th. simon rich will be here. but before we get to all that, i was tiktok-ing on tiktok this
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morning when i came across this fascinating tiktok about migrating tree frogs and wait, i am so sorry, i could be wrong here, but i think i smell some smoke and that can only mean one thing. it's time for ya burnt ♪ >> seth: welcome to the burn zone we got a lot of topics to sizzle through and not a lot of time. over here is the burner. let's turn on the gas and load her up whoo, great ghosts of the ganges first up, hiking love walking, but hate the part where you actually get somewhere? try hiking believe me, if wherever we're going was any good, they would have built a road to it. and then when i finally get there, you want me to turn around and repeat the same slog in reverse, why? so we can all look at the other side of the same tree? i know it's about the journey, not the destination. but if the journey involves a probable case of lyme disease and the destination is a
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hospital, maybe we should just bail and dudes, enough with the really big walking sticks. you're not leading a band of renegades into the badlands. somebody's grandma just passed you. also, don't say you brought snacks when you brought trail mix. that's not a snack, you just dump some bird feed and five m&ms into a ziploc sideburn trail mix >> sideburn. >> seth: hey hiking, get lost. ya burnt new covid variants, if i wanted to look sickly pale and depressed, i'd be a british soccer fan also, it's bad enough that you're deadly, but now you're making me learn the greek alphabet too the delta variant sounds like a jazz trio that performs exclusively at corporate mixers. and trust me, you don't want to catch them either. also, why do virus mutations always have to be so negative? like more contagious and turns your lungs inside out? where is the variant that makes my doink longer? >> get to work, pfizer >> seth: new covid variants, better check that thermometer cause ya burnt
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subway recently subway sandwiches announced it's making the biggest change in its history -- well, the second biggest and debuting an all-new menu listen subway, we didn't need a whole menu reset frankly, i'd be happy if the only change was the sandwiches weren't soaking wet anymore. or at least address the idea of your tuna not being, you know, tuna tuna is one of the cheapest things on the planet what you are putting in there that's cheaper paper towel chunks your tuna's not tuna your bread's not bread your footlongs are only 11 inches. you claim to be a subway, but you're above ground. also, why do you call your employees sandwich artists is it because you want them to have artistic license as an excuse "is this tuna? "this is my interpretation of tuna." subway, time to turn off that oven, because ya burnt the lab leak theory -- the theory that covid-19 escaped from a lab has been gaining more steam lately i hope the bats and pangolins are going to get an apology. i mean bats might survive, but this is literally the only thing i know about pangolins if i were them, i'd sue for defamation
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seriously, there's only one scenario where it would be acceptable to secretly develop a deadly bioweapon and accidentally let it escape and that's if it stars nicolas cage and it goes straight to video. "don't eat that pangolin!" in the meantime, the only lab leak i want to see is my brother's dog brewster finally peeing outside the house for once lab leaks, i hope you've got a safety shower in there, because ya burnt seasonal fruit why you are still a thing? don't we grow stuff with science now? if my cousin in boston can have a thriving weed grow operation in his closet in january, surely we can figure out how to give me a fresh strawberry there's only one thing delicious enough to justify only being around once a year, and that's the sexy, mysterious mcrib nobody knows how that was created. >> here's my theory, 50% lab leak 50% wet market >> seth: just need to pick that up a little bit, since there's no audience here [ laughter ]
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seasonal fruits, you're the pits and ya burnt that new york summer urine smell. it's july, which according to my nose means it's urine month in new york city. the whole city of manhattan smells like the inside of a porta potty at a music festival. and i got to say, i'm kind of into it. seriously, after a full year of staying indoors, only occasionally venturing out to enjoy the city through a layer of mask breath, i'm starting to appreciate what i missed so bring on the scent of urine i say. let me dine in the bus lane as all the odors of the land waft around me. new york city urine smell, you're number one in my book and that's why you're this week's unburnable ascend to safety my friend, and say hello to your friend, hot garbage. sand hey sand, why you coming home with me? stay at the beach. when i visit the forest, i'm not digging leaves out of my crack for a week afterwards. what's this? oh, right. i went to the woods. and how come you get so hot? dirt would never nothing says summer like killer
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waves, shining sun, and third degree burns on the soles of both my feet and don't think i'm impressed when you're in an hourglass either room knows it except for buck. that's weird, buck that's the only weird thing about you. [ laughter ] sand, even though you're stuck to my sunscreen, ya burnt. hot dog eating contests. i'm guessing they didn't ban weed from this sport this year, competitive eater joey chestnut set a new world record by downing 76 hotdogs, which is roughly 22 thousand calories frankly, i'm surprised joey chestnut can see his chest or his nuts. i can't believe i'm the first person smart enough to make that joke >> it's not something to be proud of >> seth: also, how come nobody is using condiments? for one hot dog, you use ketchup and mustard, but for 76, it's a bucket of room temperature water. hey, if i wanted wet buns, i'd sit down on the f train, or on a subway sandwich. call back.
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anyway, kudos on finding a way to make ground up pig parts even more repulsive back in my day, we wouldn't feed that crap to a dog isn't that right, rusty? [ barking what's that rusty? wrong bit? well, grease my gullet i reckon you're right. hot dog eating contest, back in my day, ya burnt next up, first time olympic athletes listen up you tryhard pieces of - [ buzzer ] oh, no that buzzer means we're out of time i guess i'll have to burn you incredibly dedicated perfect human specimens some other time. this has been "ya burnt. we'll be right back with kristin chenoweth. ♪ yeah, i mean the thing is, people like geico because it's just easy. bundling for example. you've got car insurance here. and home insurance here. why not... schuuuuzp.. put them together. save even more.
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♪ >> seth: back with us, tonight, sitting in with the 8g band, he's the touring percussionist for rock legends, fleetwood mac. check out the new single from his upcoming debut jazz album on ropeadope records and modern icon productions, "come and get it," featuring keyon harrold, which is available now on all streaming platforms. taku hirano is here. so great to have you, taku our first guest tonight is a tony and emmy-award winning actress, who you know from shows like "the west wing" and "glee," and the broadway production,
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"wicked. she stars in the new series "schmigadoon!" with new episodes streaming fridays on apple tv plus let's take a look. >> you know what, we are both outraged by these outlandish allegations. >> the only outrageous thing here, is your behavior, which has now officially been deemed as unseemly by the mothers against the future therefore, no one, and i mean no one in schmigadoon will give you lodging. and harvey, don't even think about letting them back in after i've left. i can read you like a book oh wait, books have spines [ laughter ] >> seth: please welcome back to the show, kristin chenoweth. hello, kristin >> hi, honey >> seth: it's so lovely to see you. >> you too, man. i've missed you. >> seth: your wardrobe is the physical manifestation of your spirit [ laughter ] >> you know what, seth i thought, i'm bringing it, seth i don't care no more jackets and no makeup. i'm bringing it just to the seth meyers show in fact -- >> seth: look at that, top to tail
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yes! no sweat pants on kristin. thank you. >> no. i'm bringing it to you, seth okay >> seth: we -- don't think it will be unappreciated by everyone here. thank you so, so much. [ light laughter ] >> you're welcome. and by the way, i loved in "ya burnt" when you said the delta variant. yesterday, i flew delta to get to l.a., and i love delta, okay. like, i love delta airlines. i'm not -- i'm not ashamed to say it why must they call it the delta variant? why? >> seth: yeah, you know who has no sympathy? the good people at corona who made the beer. [ laughter ] they're like - okay they're like, "oh, is it hard for you, delta?" [ crying ] so, first of all, before i ask about “schmigadoon!,” you -- a lot of people, learned new skills, a lot of people had to find new platforms for their talent you found your way onto tiktok during the pandemic. how did that come about in the first place? >> well, you were talking about tiktok-ing this morning. >> seth: yes >> i was unaware about -- i'm
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not that lame, but my boyfriend was like, "you've got to do tiktok." and i was the crazy -- not crazy, but you know, insane person running around with lysol and singing high notes and unfortunately, i was doing it in a winnie-the-pooh onesie, because why wear anything with a waistband? >> seth: right >> so, he said these would be great tiktoks, and you know, he was right. i'm ashamed and yet -- and yet i'm thrilled, because -- [ singing i walk around, spray, wear my winnie-the-pooh onesie, and you know, it's a hit what can i say >> seth: look, if tiktok wasn't built for that, what was it built for? [ laughter ] >> i don't know. >> seth: so, that's you being very modern, very of the moment. “schmigadoon!” is a lovely throwback to, sort of, these style of musical from the 40s and 50s. it seems like this was a perfect match, you in this project how did it come about? how were you approached for it >> you know, i know that you understand that, especially in
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new york - new york was so hit, right, with the pandemic i think the hardest, in my opinion. and barry sonnenfeld called me and i'd had a lot of loss at the time, and he called me and said, "i want -- you know, this new show." and i'm a huge fan of cecily's and i -- and, obviously, alan's one of my best friends, and dove i wanted to do it, but, i just didn't feel i had it in my spirit i just thought, "i don't know if i can.” he goes, "you have an 18-page song, and we're going to do it in one take. now, he knows me this is my fifth project with him. and i went, "i'll be there." so, that's how it happened and it was the hardest thing i've ever done, and the most -- it was so fun. it was so fun. >> seth: this is -- you basically do, inspired by "ya got trouble" from "the music man," and, so this isn't just an 18-page song this is like an 18-page, single spaced, patter song. >> thank you for knowing that. >> seth: and, i would imagine it's harder when you film it, even though you can do multiple takes, this was done in one take
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>> yes >> seth: and that is, i mean everything you do on stage is, obviously, one take, when people see you on broadway. but, how was it different doing it with cameras and crews around >> i got really good friends with camera a operator, jim. we -- we practiced, you know, i don't know if you heard, we wore cones. like, we wore cones and masks. i felt like i'd been spayed. [ light laughter ] but, it was fine, i didn't care, seth i showed up for rehearsal. i said, "jim, follow me. just let's -- i gather the town. so it wasn't just that i was doing a 18-page patter song, thank you for knowing what that means. but, i was also gathering the town, so i've used the entire set, and one mistake means back to one and i thought, "it's not going to be on my -- my dime or problem if we mess up. so i practiced in my hotel room, by myself yabadabadoing around, like a freak, doing tribulation. it's called tribulation. >> seth: you mentioned when you're yabadabadoing in your hotel room that you shared a wall with your friend, alan cumming
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is that correct? >> i hope we're still friends. yes. [ light laughter ] he's a night owl, as am i. but, he's -- i'm much -- i go to bed at like 5:00 a.m he goes to bed at like 2:30, 3:00 sleep, and i'd be like, "we've and i wanted to hear myself really good. every soprano knows you practice in the bathroom. and, i'd hear bang, bang, bang [ laughter ] "shut up [ light laughter ] shut the -- shut up! and then, at like 8:30 in the morning, he'd be, like, doing his song you know, and i'm like, "i can hear you i just went to bed." this was during quarantine i mean, but that being said, he beat me -- he got out of quarantine three days before me. and when i was done, he was there and took me -- he's vegan you know which is fine, but i'm not and we went to a vegan diner we had dinner. he took care of me i -- i -- i love him
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>> seth: it's a very -- it strikes me that you guys have a very nice friendship he did tell a story about you that i, now, need to verify, cause it's a pretty memorable story about you sending muffins to someone >> okay. with -- i have to just say, yes, i saw him tell the story and i died 1 thousand deaths but, one of my friends, she used to run the theater wing. i was unaware that she had passed her family reached out said, "we're honoring her. >> seth: mm-hmm. >> i was doing my -- i was young. i was doing -- not paying attention. i had a deal with mrs. beasley's thank you, mrs. beasley's. i sent mrs. beasley's cookies to the -- >> seth: the honoring. >> it was her funeral, seth. [ laughter ] it was her funeral, seth and alan cumming loves to tell it he also loves to tell when i very first got invited to my first fashion show, this was -- i'm -- i'm dating myself, a very, very famous designer woman
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sent me a bunch of clothes well, you know i'm 4'11. you know my size >> seth: mm-hmm. >> it's hard for me to -- so, she sent nothing that fit, except this one cute -- really cute skirt so i thought, "i'll add my own jacket." i got to sit next to her and she -- when i saw her, she goes, "hmm, inventive.doesn't l. but nothing fit. it was later that i found out it was a tube top [ laughter ] and it was in the new york post. >> seth: oh, no. did they know it was a tube top? or did they think you were being inventive as well? >> i hope they thought i was being inventive. >> seth: yeah. >> but, her face is, kind of, like - this was like 1999 what are you gonna do? what are you gonna do? >> seth: look, everybody was tube topping in '99. [ laughter ] >> right >> seth: you couldn't walk in new york city without bumping into somebody wearing a tube top as a dress hey -- >> but as a skirt. [ laughter ] >> seth: as a skirt. so you -- you know, i think -- i've asked a lot of broadway veterans about this question, about the fact that broadway's opening up again and what they're most excited to do and a lot of people have told me, you know, it's less about getting back on stage, which
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they desperately want to do, but that they want to be in the audience again for a broadway show is that something that's true for you as well? >> you know, just like you, you're doing your show and we -- we -- we listen to the audience, right? it's the relationship between yourself and your audience same with me when i'm in a concert or if i'm doing a role i listen that's the biggest part of my job. when i'm in the audience, i participate. so, yes, i can't wait. i'm going to go as soon as i can, i'm going to go see "lion king." my boyfriend has never seen the -- he's -- he's only seen one -- two broadway shows. i'm going to got take him to that i'm going to take him to see "hamilton. i mean, i want to -- i want to celebrate my friends i want to celebrate the art of music theater and plays, anything live. just like how i know you feel when you're, like, you know, "ya burnt. i'm sitting over here cracking up, anhe me. you know what i mean >> seth: yeah. we would very -- we should have mic'd you. that was a big mistake it was real quiet in here. >> you should have, because i
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was laughing my butt off [ laughter ] the subway thing, forget it. >> seth: well, it is always so lovely to see you. >> thank you >> seth: thank you, as always, for making time for us and, i hope next time to see you here in the city >> amen. and my love to your family and, just in case, stay safe [ laughter ] >> seth: oh, good -- good product placement. "schmigadoon!" is currently streaming on apple tv plus we'll be right back with tim robinson ♪ ♪ [upbeat music] ♪ ♪♪ ♪♪ ♪♪ ♪♪ if you're 55 and up, t-mobile has plans built just for you.
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♪ >> seth: our next guest is an emmy nominated writer and comedian, you know from shows like "saturday night live" and "detroiters. the second season of his fantastic show, "i think you should leave with tim robinson," is streaming globally on netflix. let's take a look. >> they're saying they want to drop corncob tv because we showed over 400 naked dead bodies on our show, "coffin flop." [ screaming if you love corn cobtv shows,
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it's time to tell spectrum, "no. they're saying "coffin flops" is not a show [ screaming it's just hours and hours of footage of real people falling out of coffins at funerals [ screaming there's no explanation just body after body busti pavement [ laughter ] >> seth: please welcome back to the show our friend tim robinson hey, timmy how you are, buddy >> hey, pal, how you are >> seth: i'm fantastic that has -- continues to prove a point that i've said to people is i will -- i have still not stopped laughing at "coffin flops. i've seen -- i've watched it ten times start to finish, it never -- it never stops getting funny -- being funny. >> appreciate that, pal. thank you so much. >> seth: there was actually a lovely article where they interviewed the stunt guys and the directors of that sketch because this really is the audacity of sketch writers that you and zach kanin, your co-writer, you write this sketch and then somebody had to figure
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out how to make the coffins flop >> yeah. and the hardest thing i had to do was sitting in a white room, and just scream in the camera. >> seth: were there -- i heard there was one coffin flop that you wrote that they couldn't figure out how to do >> well, not -- i don't want to take credit away from them, cause i bet if we would have been like, "can we please try this?" but i think zach and i even were like, "that's -- there's no way. and it was -- the description was, "person flops out of coffin, rolls down hill and hits a bird a bird that's standing." it was -- and the line, of course, was like, "yeah, some of them yard sail down a hill and hit birds. but yeah the hardest thing is you don't want to hit a bird and how do you get a bird to stand there with it's back turned until it gets rolled into by a corpse? [ laughter ] >> seth: yeah. do you distract a bird with, like, somebody has to hold a worm so that the bird doesn't see the coffin coming?
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>> every time it starts to turn around you're like, "no, no, no! looky, looky, look." [ laughter ] >> seth: do you remember mike o'brien has a wonderful cameo in this, do you remember the sketch he wrote for snl which was he was a reporter interviewing bugs? >> oh, yeah. of course. yeah >> seth: and the same thing. again it's that thing where you're a writer, you don't think about it, and then they hire a guy who, like, brings bugs >> yeah. that was - zach and i wrote that. >> seth: i forgot you wrote that >> yeah, zach and i wrote that, and it was, like, there was one bug there that the bug handler was like -- he's like, "don't let that one get away. that one gets away, it could mess up the entire new york city ecosystem. and we're like, "what is that bug? put it away! [ laughter ] >> seth: like, how good an actor is that bug that it's worth risking it >> no. not worth it you have to tell me this i don't want that bug around >> seth: he's real good though he'll hit a mark
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never loses his light. >> we also found out on that thing it was, like -- the whole thing was like bugs, like, when you see them they're running or whatever and when it's cold they don't run. [ laughter ] >> seth: which the guy, of course, doesn't tell you when you call up and hire him he just shows up on set. >> "do they run? oh, yeah, they run they run." [ laughter ] >> seth: you -- there's a really great clip of this stunt test on "coffin flops. >> yeah. >> seth: and the thing i really like is it's very matter of fact you just hear directors and stunt guys, and they do a test and a body -- a stunt man falls out, and you just hear the director say, "oh, this is going to be a funny sketch." like, you just have to see it once to know this is really going to work >> yeah. i mean it was a whole day in the cemetery of stunt people flopping out of those things a whole day. >> seth: um, you -- another sketch i want to ask about,
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there's a action movie trailer and the action star crashmore -- detective crashmore, am i saying that >> yeah. >> seth: and then you find out he's being played by santa claus. >> right >> seth: and santa claus as an actor that doesn't like to talk about being santa claus. i'm doing this a giant disservice >> it's fine >> yeah. >> seth: and i've told you before, i obviously am happiest when you are in the sketches, but this is a sketch you're not in, how happy were you when you found this guy to play santa >> so, i mean, yeah. he auditioned. he was so fantastic. such a good actor. his name is biff wiff. he really did a really great job. [ laughter ] >> seth: what is his name? >> biff wiff i'm -- yeah. >> seth: no, i mean, i feel like he - i mean - >> maybe it's really santa >> seth: i feel like you have the job on the headshot at that point. >> there's a lot of santas out there. >> seth: that's true >> there's a lot of santas out there. >> seth: when you're working off-season, you're going to get a lot of santas coming in. >> yeah, there's a ton of santas
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he wasn't the only person who auditioned who looked like santa, i'll tell you that. >> seth: really? >> no! there's a lot of people who look like santa out there >> seth: i want to talk about how the show, now it's like a reoccurring theme, of course, of two seasons that hot dogs are sort of the -- i would say hot dogs and fedoras are the two images i now think of the show >> oh, nice. >> seth: the show has been very meme-able. this is a sketch, from season one -- a fantastic sketch about a hot dog car crashing into a store, and then this gentleman trying to figure out who did it. it's been used a lot, like, politically whenever a politician sort of feigns sort of ignorance as to how we got to this place do you ever think about what a politician, maybe an older politician must think when someone is putting this in their twitter feed >> i mean, yeah. i think there's an article i've mentioned that who had talked about it it was like, out of context that doesn't mean anything. it must --
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i've forgotten what article. i wish i could cite them but i was like, “well, if you see that, you're just like, 'i have no clue what any of this is it doesn't make any sense.'" [ laughter ] >> seth: i just like mitch mcconnell wondering like, "what is this supposed to mean?" >> that's exactly who the article cited. and it is like -- you would also have to be like -- cause it's not the first sketch you'd have to go, like, five episodes in to be like, "what? where does this come up?” that guy - >> seth: hey, i also want to talk about the fact that you, and i say this - anyone who follows you on instagram will know this about you, you're an accomplished, i hope that's a fair description, an accomplished skate boarder. that you've been doing this for a long time. >> i wouldn't say i'm accomplished i skate. >> seth: yeah. >> i'm not that good but i quit for a long time -- just started back up in the past three years. >> seth: and one of the other things that happened, you have -- is your son 10 now is that how old he is? >> yeah. well, he's 11 now. he's about to turn 12. >> seth: okay. and he started skating as well
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>> yes >> seth: did he find it via you, or did he find it on his own >> um, he found it -- i mean, i was skating and then he started. but we live in, you know, we live in california where, like, skating is huge. so i think that almost everybody -- a lot of people start skating that live here so - >> seth: does he think you're cool because you're a dad who knows how to skate >> no. not at all and actually, any time i show him a clip he's like, "you're going too slow you have to speed up it doesn't look good if you're going that slow. >> seth: when you show him a clip of yourself >> if i'm like, "look what i got. and he's like, "you to get more speed. >> seth: do your kids -- you have a daughter as well. penny? buster and penny is that right? >> that's right. yep. >> seth: do they - do they watch the show do they like -- does that comedy of "i think you can leave" work for them >> well, it's "i think you should leave." seth, you said, "could >> seth: what is it? >> you said you were a fan what is this
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>> seth: look, i'm sorry that you have a five word title that if i -- a title so long that, that like, people write i-t-y-s-l. >> okay, well, "late night with seth meyers. >> oh, are we using names? do names count because then i'd like to add “with tim robinson.” >> that's not my name. that's the title that's part of the title that's not my name that's not talking about me. >> seth: dude -- that's not talking about you? >> no. that's just the name that's not talking about me. >> seth: of course it's talking about you. >> it's not in reference to me >> seth: it's your - >> it's not! >> seth: all right do your kids watch it? [ laughter ] >> no, they don't. >> seth: good. gooduger ] >> yeah. >> seth: buddy, again, i've texted you so much about it. it's so much fun
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it's everything i wanted the second season to be. congratulations to you and everybody that worked on it. >> thank you so much, man. i really appreciate it, pal. i miss you >> seth: i miss you too. i'll see you soon. the second season of "i think you should leave" is streaming globally on netflix. we'll be right back with simon rich ♪ ice t, stone cold calling on everyone to turn to cold washing with tide. ♪ this is a cold call! ♪ hello, my name is ice t. can you spare a few seconds to learn about cold water washing with tide? hi my name is steve. did you know washing in cold can save you $100 a year on your energy bill. why wouldn't you turn to cold? it helps the environment. what? because stone cold said so. plus, tide cleans great in cold. ♪ this was a cold call! ♪
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alright, guys, no insurance talk on beach day. -i'm down. -yes, please. [ chuckles ] don't get me wrong, i love my rv, but insuring it is such a hassle. same with my boat. the insurance bills are through the roof. -[ sighs ] -be cool. i wish i could group my insurance stuff. -[ coughs ] bundle. -the house, the car, the rv. like a cluster. an insurance cluster. -woosah. -[ chuckles ] -i doubt that exists. -it's a bundle! it's a bundle, and it saves you money! hi. i'm flo from progressive, and i couldn't help but overhear... super fun beach day, everybody.
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♪ >> seth: our next guest is an award-winning writer, whose work you know from "saturday night live," the tbs series, "miracle workers," "an american pickle. his latest book, "new teeth," is available on july 27th please welcome back to the show our very good friend, simon rich hello simon, so good to see you. >> great to see you. thanks for having me >> seth: i'm thrilled to have you.
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i'm wondering how, as a writer, you managed during the pandemic. i've always known you to be an incredibly prolific -- like, somebody who works very hard at their craft. i'm guessing, and i hope this doesn't come off wrong, that you might have thrived >> yeah. i tried to be as productive as possible and putting as many hours as ever, if not more, but seeing you hold up the book, i now am a little self-conscious, 'cause i feel like the book should be longer, given the severity and length of the global pandemic. like, if i -- if i can't crack 300 pages in 2020 -- >> seth: yeah. >> then, you know, it's never going to happen, probably. >> seth: yeah, i'm looking now, acknowledgements is starting at like 225 so that's pretty weak. >> exactly >> seth: you -- you have two daughters. what are they -- what are they, four and not even a year >> yeah, four and six months yeah, it's -- it's pretty amazing. it's very difficult, as you know, but the -- the thing that's great about kids, is that it takes them a pretty long time to be able to form memories.
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so, as a parent, like, the first four years of parenting, it's basically like exhibition baseball [ light laughter ] it doesn't really count. like, there's no true record of it it's still low stakes. like tim tebow is still out there taking a pass. it's the - [ laughter ] >> seth: what -- it must be, you know, nice to have, like, a life changing experience, like children, when you are someone who's looking for new things to write about. obviously, it's a wealth of -- of subject matter. >> yeah. i mean, material isn't like the sole reason why i had kids, but it's like i would say, probably somewhere in the top ten >> seth: you've had a lot of stories published over the years in "the new yorker." one of the stories is in this collection, "the big nap." has it -- it must still be nice to be published in "the new yorker." and i'm wondering, over the years, have you ever gotten a sense, you ever been on a subway or anything and realized people are reading, either storof yours, or one of your books? it's happened probably, like, you know, three or four times in
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my life. always on the subway in new york city. and it's just absolutely terrifying and i just lock eyes with them creepily from across the train and i'm just, like, so anxious about whether or not they're going to smirk, which is really the best you could ever hope for from a piece of written comedy and there is nothing more horrible than -- than them reading the first paragraph and then just turning the page [ light laughter ] but i guess if you're like an actor or a stand-up, that's your -- that's your day-to-day existence. and i've always been so shocked at the bravery of somebody who can kind of live in that terror for an hour at a time. 'cause i can barely handle it for a few fleeting seconds >> seth: i -- we worked together at "snl. it was a time i look back on fondly, to the point that i probably overlook exactly how much stress and anxiety filled those years. you've done a lot since you've left "snl," created two shows, wrote for "the simpsons," multiple books, films. is it true that that's still where all your stress dreams come from?
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>> yes i -- i have exclusively "snl" nightmares i have -- i have only had "saturday night live" nightmares since leaving the show it's always, pretty much, the same it's -- lorne's on a horse >> seth: uh-huh. [ laughter ] >> he's looking down at me from a very great height. and there's always been some kind of paperwork snafu, and as a result, i have to go on camera and perform, which is not my --my -- my job as a writer. but he's always saying, you know, "you have to go out there, right now. then he -- he speeds off on -- on -- his horse. and i'll say in these dreams, you are in all of them >> seth: okay. >> and you were my -- you were my head writer when i worked for that show. and you were also a real mentor figure and you were really nice to me, you know, during that time in my life but in these dreams, you do not help me. [ laughter ] you are not openly antagonistic, but you never try -- you never
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listen to reason you're always like -- "lorne's already galloped to the control room [ laughter ] and i hope you know the lyrics to 'poker face, 'cause lady gaga's contract didn't go through, and you have to do it, right now. you're never pitching like, "oh, i could ask maya rudolph [ laughter ] she's a great singer, and she's already in the building. you're just like, "it has to be you. >> seth: once the horse leaves, that's it. we got to go >> i don't know why it's a horse. i think it's a canadian thing. [ laughter ] but have you ever had that same dream? because, if so, you know - >> seth: all my dreams are entirely -- my "snl" dreams are always that wally is nowhere to be seen. and that the cue cards are nowhere there. and it's always someone saying like, "but you know it, right? i mean, like, "oy, oy, oy. i do not." you went -- you also went from "snl" to pixar, which, when you think about, like, the writing process is the most jarring transition you can imagine >> yeah. and it was like weeks later.
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and it was completely strange, because at "snl," you have six days to create 90 minutes of entertainment. and then, at pixar it's like you have six years to create 90 minutes and so, leaving an environment where literally friday night it's like, "well, we have no cold open or monologue like, we need to --" and people are in tears, racing around frantic and then, like, three weeks later i'm at pixar, and it's like the meetings are like, "alright we've been at this three years, we really need to, like, pick a lane, in terms of this characters eyebrows [ laughter ] i think we need to -- we don't need to crack it today, but let's start to dial in these eyebrows." and people are just in the pool and lazing about in hammocks >> seth: you -- i knew -- i guess i didn't know you were actual classmates. but you went to harvard, and you were classmates with mark zuckerberg. did you ever cross paths with him then >> yes so, i -- i never met him at harvard.
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we were in the same class, but i never met him. i think it's 'cause we hung out with different crowds. and i was more into the writing comedy crowd, and he was more focused on developing a vice like grip on democracy and dominating the world so i think he hung out with different -- different -- different folks. >> seth: yeah, yeah. >> but, i do remember when facebook started i remember that week and -- or the facebook as it was known then and i learned about it from what everybody considered to be the creepiest guy at harvard which is really -- that's -- creepiest guy at harvard is, like, saying like fastest skater in the nhl it's like a big -- you know, it's a big deal, and he -- >> seth: a lot of competition. >> a lot of competition for that -- for that -- yeah -- for that spot. and he called everybody over, and he was like, "hey everybody, check out this new website that lets you stalk girls." and he showed us the facebook. and it was like, "you just type in the girl's name, there's their face, there's the list of books she likes, so you can
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pretend that you like them too." and then, back then during the early days of facebook, it would often list their class schedule. so you could physically track somebody in real time. and i remember this -- this guy literally, he was like, "science center b." and he shut -- he shut his computer, and he grabbed whatever dave eggers novel she had said she liked and just ran out of the room. and i looked at everybody and i said, "okay, i am making a prediction right now, this mark kid, he is going to get in a lot of trouble [ laughter ] he's going to get a dean's warning at least." and everybody kind of nodded solemnly but i was wrong. [ laughter ] he became very, very successful. but that's why i've never been on facebook, because i associate it with, like, truly this, like, creepy, evil dude, and i just think that facebook is really awful, but i -- i do invest. [ light laughter ] >> seth: well, you -- yeah, i mean, you have to. >> yeah. 'cause zuckerberg isn't the only
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jew from the class of '06. i have two bat mitzvahs to pay for, so you know >> seth: sure. nobody would -- nobody would judge you for that, simon. >> yeah, exactly >> seth: buddy, it is so good to see you, as always congratulations on the book. "new teeth" is available everywhere july 27th please remember to support your local and independent book stores we'll be right back with more "late night. ♪ (laverne cox) surround yourself with people that know your worth. ♪stand up, when you're standing in the♪ ♪presence of a legend♪ ♪stand up♪ ♪when you're standing in the presence♪ ♪of a legend♪ ♪stand up♪ ♪when you're standing in the presence♪ ♪of a woman that's done done it way before your♪ ♪legs were walkin' let your actions do the talkin'♪ ♪you better stand, stand, stand, stand up♪ ♪♪
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with just 2 medicines in 1 pill, dovato is as effective as a 3-drug regimen... to help you reach and stay undetectable. research shows people who take hiv treatment as prescribed and get to and stay undetectable can no longer transmit hiv through sex. don't take dovato if you're allergic to its ingredients or if you take dofetilide. taking dovato with dofetilide can cause serious or life-threatening side effects. hepatitis b can become harder to treat while on dovato. don't stop dovato without talking to your doctor, as your hepatitis b may worsen or become life-threatening. serious or life-threatening side effects can occur, including allergic reactions, lactic acid buildup, and liver problems. if you have a rash and other symptoms of an allergic reaction, stop dovato and get medical help right away. tell your doctor if you have kidney or liver problems, or if you are, may be, or plan to be pregnant. dovato may harm your unborn baby. use effective birth control while on dovato. do not breastfeed while taking dovato. most common side effects are headache, nausea, diarrhea,
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trouble sleeping, tiredness, and anxiety. so much goes into who i am. hiv medicine is one part of it. ask your doctor about dovato-i did. ♪♪ ♪ >> seth: after 16 months of not going to bars i broke my streak in a very big way, and went day drinking with the one and only lorde. we shot it already, and i'm only barely recovered, but tune in tomorrow and we will show it to you. plus lorde will be here in the studio to talk about it and perform a song from her new album, “solar power” right here. it's a big day for us tomorrow so please watch. we will be right back. ♪
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what if you could push a button band less carbon would ben put into the air.g if there were a button that would help you use less energy, breathe cleaner air, and even take on climate change... would you press it?

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