tv Gutfeld FOX News December 9, 2021 8:00pm-9:00pm PST
smithsonian. because there will be a woman president and that woman president is going to be standing on the shoulders of hillary clinton. >> laura: standing on the shoulders? first of all, the first woman president is going to be conservative, thank you very much. make sure you tune into an overnight for exclusive interview with donald trump. remember, america now and forever. gutfeld takes it. ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ >> greg: happy thursday, everyone. what a great show week outs tonight. and you know, just hours after our all american christmas tree was torched by a babbling madman, not to be confused with geraldo, a new tree was erected, and it looks absolutely
fabulous. so a big thank you to that adorable, tiny elf, dana perino and her tiny little elf friends. they worked all night. almost as fabulous looking as harold ford jr. yeah. welcome to his first time on the show. you need a new agent. this shows kills more jobs than china. but it's a tribute to the spirit of the people who work here and delivered this magnificent show. you can burn down the tree and we are just going to put up another. and by we, i mean not to me. other people did. i didn't put it back up. the only thing i know how to put up is a two-way bathroom mirror. but also, just hours after the fox christmas tree was torched by a babbling madman, the babbling madman was released. cnn anchor is now face more punishment than arsonists.
you win, universe. also, here's a funny side story. a photographer told "the new york post" by the arsonist had allegedly exposed himself to reporters outside the ghislaine maxwell trial in manhattan last week. okay, that is not a funny side story, but at least we found something joe devito and the arsonist have in common. thanks to this amendment, we are learning how many crimes you can get away with. showing your junk and burning people's stuff. what -- calls a tuesday. i won't say the miscreant's name because that is what he would really want and also it is very hard to pronounce. is it -- but it's true. the arsonist who torched the fox news christmas tree was freed after his arraignment on wednesday night because his charges were not eligible for bail under new liberal reform laws. he is a better chance of facing
consequences from smokey the bear. who could have seen this coming? well, we all did. >> this whole issue has to do with the revolving door of justice. because the guy who lit the tree on fire's going to get out tomorrow. it's not felony or send. >> it's an offense under new york law where he has to be valid. speak out so he is going to be out. he might be out right now. >> greg: it is weird to live in a world we can actually predict the bad news but all you get is a shrug and return. crime is like being the guy who cleans the restroom at the view. you clean it up and ate is just worse the next day. but it's not like we weren't warned. it is like a weatherman who says hey, you see that category five train off the coast of new jersey and moving west at 2? i think we should get out of there and no one moves. that is our government. you can save them look, we are
releasing fiends that are about to offend and like kat confronted with the simple math problem, they just stare blankly. and then of course the fiends reoffend. i can go through the examples of the violent felon but there are so many of them it would take up the entire show and bleed literally into the next hour. in the last thing i want to do is piss off evil shannon bream. but it's an old news another violent criminal -- that's how it works. the dress a exists now keep criminals safe from consequences. here's a typical scene playing out all over. >> good to see you again. we will added you here and adjust. >> that's great. i've a robbery scheduled for 2:00 today. >> well, it is a busy time of the year for everyone. we will just run down your
pending charges. larceny, assault, shoplifting, vandalism, public intoxication. >> he almost forgot indecent exposure. >> drug dealing, drug possession, weapons possession, unpaid parking ticket, arsenate, and mail fraud, and since none of these are bail offenses, you are free to leave. happy holidays. >> that's great. thank you. speak out did you your mask? >> i don't wear one. >> you son of a bitch. we are trying to keep the city safe. >> greg: so now that the christmas creep is free to roam and burn down other stuff, where do you go? well, there is that 9:00 p.m. slot open at cnn. i kid. there is no evidence this guy groped anyone. but we all know where he went. now the head writer at colbert. he turned and five cereal box
tops to get the job. last night, colbert lamely joked about the burning christmas tree, and that it is getting its own show on fox. if that were true, it would instantly get better ratings than colbert. that is because a christmas tree fire is way more entertaining than a dumpster fire. remember this? ♪ ♪ >> greg: that might be at worse crime than arson. even in today's legal climate i judge would refuse bail for that felony. but at least he tried to be funny and is failing. what is cnn's excuse? here's the cranky cricket monitor using the arson attack to slim fox news. >> now, no one was injured in this incident but they could have been. this is serious. incredibly scary to feel that your workplace is under attack unless your workplace is the capital. but according to many, many fox
posts, it's not such a big deal. >> greg: oh, my god. only the psycho at cnn could make an arson attack into an attack on a target. for cnn, the attack is merely an opportunity to wag your swollen finger at the people who are kicking or ass every night. arson is indeed bad, but do you even care about january 6th? if she got any dumber she could fill chris cuomo's seat. just his seat. so the last few days, we will show you what is good and bad about the world. the stuff colbert and tina don't understand along with others who are walled off from the consequences of unchecked client. thanks to a progressive perversion of incentives, criminal react as you expect them to. these people are lawless, but they are not done. meeting it consequences no long after only -- prison was once a defensive incentive and it worked which is what we got rid of it. we are now pissing on the grave
of common sense. we were lucky nobody died the night of the arson, -- that's why i avoid casinos. so the madman walked which sends a message to others like him. repercussions no longer exist for the most disgusting behavior, without its assault, murder, or arson. but there is good news. the tree is back out. and like me, it looks great. and if you keep burning it down, we will just put up another. that is the real holiday spirit, and we need more ever. let's welcome tonight's guests. if he were a bear attack, i did beat him off in the woods. fox news contributor, harold ford jr. if laughter is the best medicine, he's definitely not fda approved.
writer, median, joe devito. tickets to his shows are a lot like movie endings. you can't give them away. comedian joe machi. and she is looking forward to not remembering the holidays. news contributor, kat timpf. harold, welcome to the show. >> what a show already. >> greg: so now i know you're definitely definitely not running for president. has america lost the plot? if this continues, we are done as a country because this is the kind of thing that holds us together, law and order, right? >> at our very core. one of the reasons you have bail when someone is arrested because you want to keep them in jail. and if they are going to get out, there has to be some skin they have in the game or others have in the game. i thought what happened at the capital was terrible. i thought what happened out here
was terrible. what happened on the grounds not far from us. and for him to be out and for us to have to have pictures posted around to ensure he didn't come up and try to threaten or due anything outside including you, something is wrong with the system. bail reform and trying to assure that nonviolent offenders and those who may end up serving more time if they were convicted for the offense is a smart thing, but a violent offender, coddling violence, enabling violent offenders, that is not -- that is the core of our society. an nation that is governed by a rule of law. >> greg: we can have discussions or disagreed with each other if we are too scared to go outside. you know, joe, i thought it was kind of interesting minutes of the pictures of the arsonists. he is better dressed than you. did you notice he had a number of interesting jackets to wear.
>> yeah, he was very fashion forward. >> greg: meanwhile, you are dressed like judd hirsch in "taxi." my references for my audience. i'm not going to talk about tiktok videos. thank you. >> greg, that is just the relief factor talking. >> greg: you know, if you snort it, it is just faster acting. i learned that from charlie kirk. i'm joking. that's a joke. what was the question? >> i don't think there was a question. >> greg: the question is what is wrong with the world, joe. >> it's awful to think -- not this crazy guy, it's bad enough he does not seem to have suffered any penalty for it, but there are people who are celebrating the burning down of a religious symbol loved by
millions of children around the world -- ha ha, take that fox news. it really shows this world that we live and where things are upside down. and this guy appears to be mentally ill. he is a danger to himself and others. now, what about the new york city money. this is about a billion to the which turned into a slush fund for the mayor's wife. now that i think about it, maybe there is no greater sign of mental illness than marrying bill de blasio. >> greg: it's funny. the christmas tree is not necessarily a religious symbol, but it's kind of become one. it's an effective religious symbol, and you are right, there really was no outrage about it. fox news is sad because it was so beautiful, but there was no outrage. i imagine if it were a blm banner, holy [bleep]. joe, if they've found out what you did, joe machi.
this guy exposed himself and we find out that must be legal too. >> just so everyone is clear, the arsonists exposed himself, not any of us. just don't want anyone to get the wrong idea. i don't like the revolving door of justice, greg, because i don't even like revolving doors. they are my second leading reason for trips to the emergency room after following up treadmills and ahead of mixing bleach and ammonia. but to answer his point, i looked up on a website that handles statistics, that back in 1990 when your references were only ten, the government had 45 billion on mental health.
and in 2020 was $238 billion mental health. >> greg: where does this stuff go? because if you walk up and down new york city streets, you see it's a menagerie of mental illness. how about that for a bit of alliteration? a menagerie, if you will, of mental illness. menagerie. >> great job. >> greg: i love how cnn use the arson to go, but, remember what you guys did? that's amazing. >> yeah. i don't know if that is amazing. you can kind of expected because also i don't know anybody here or elsewhere that they didn't say that january 6th was bad. i said it so many times. i feel like i have to say it again now. it was bad, guys. i think it was horrible. because everybody -- i don't know where this narrative came from that we don't think it is bad.
and yeah, the christmas tree, still remarkable, but a huge day for arsonists. it wasn't just like a symbol of whatever, love, and whatever i'm not a christmas gal. i don't want to set on fire but whatever it is, it was at least a very expensive one. like half a million dollars. completely torches and he gets to go home? if i were on arsonists, which i'm definitely not, i would be very excited. >> greg: i think he set fire to the tree is no different than setting fire to a trash can. like if you start a fire in a trash can because there is no human potential of being in it. so unless -- speak out there is always human potential of being anywhere. >> greg: that is why. even the cost is not relevant. it's amazing, isn't a question like >> people forget that because firefighters do such a great job even for something like that, lemon could have easily died >> greg: but you know it, i have to tell you.
with a great hour of programming out of it on "the five." so burn those trees. i'm kidding. that's a joke. but it really was nice. we had a big crowd out there. quite enjoyable. it was catered so i had pigs in a blanket. i love pigs in a blanket. all right. coming up. jussie smollett was a two bit actor -- only from discover. are you one of the millions of americans who experience occasional bloating, gas or abdominal discomfort? taking align every day can help. align contains a quality probiotic developed by gastroenterologists. it adds more good bacteria to your gut to naturally help soothe your occasional bloating, gas and abdominal discomfort. support your digestive health with align,
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he was on trial in chicago for faking an attack on himself in 2019, creating funny story and claiming that magna had wearing assailants beat them up, tied a noose around his neck, because he was black and. it sounds so outlandish i had to be fake. and very much like kat's hair, it was. the jury finding him guilty. found guilty today after eight hours of deliberation. earlier, smollett even took the stand in his own defense saying, "there was no hoax." but he couldn't act his way out of this one. he now faces up to three years in prison, but most experts say he will probably just get probation and community service. all right. i will go to you, joe, first. what you think of the verdict? >> i don't think it could have gone any other way. i want to know what that sixth charge was that he seemed to have not been found guilty of, do you know that? >> greg: i don't know. >> he is not a good actor -- and we found out he is not a very good director.
and he is not a good casting agent. because if they were white supremacist, could he have gotten two bigger, blacker guys to play the role? were shaquille o'neal and karl malone not available? and his special effects, his noose looked like a piece of linguine around his neck. >> greg: and the best thing about the dudes he had it under the collar. who put the noose -- oh, let's get it in the collar. going to church later. but it's funny. the nigerians couldn't even do cultural appropriations. those roles were meant for white actors. even when they challenged on that and he said look, i have a scratch under my eye and you see this two gigantic guys. the two of them, it could've been 30 jussie smolletts against one of those and they still would've kicked his ass. i'm still not sure how --
he created a lot of very bad energy and he could be looking at seriously, a couple of days of probation. >> greg: and then a reality show. all about that would jussie smollett. if this is a vindication, other than joe, for nigerians? they get a bad rap with emails. >> we can only hope that cancel culture doesn't ruin their acting career. but to add to joe's point, i relate to jussie smollett because i have faked that i've won a number of fights. in fact, all the fights i've ever won are fake. they never happened. but if i cast those two guys at my adversaries, and i was like they got some shots in. but, man, that really gives actors a bad name. just like actors give their kids bad names.
>> greg: nicely done. p5, i think that smollett has kind of an interesting insight into how the world works. i don't think he is not worried. that almost every calamity can be turned into some type of opportunity. that's why i do think he is going to have his own show. he will probably go on probation and we will see him again. >> i guess, but he will have to say, i did it. there is a video of the rehearsal. also, there were rehearsals. he put so much time into this and spent no time thinking about it. which is remarkable to me. finding the people, rehearsing it. he is like yeah, i will write them a personal check. it will be fine. how does he even have a friend right now? do they have to be like yeah, this is completely unfair.
i can't believe -- this was not a hoax. you were hate crimed. he has to say i did it. >> greg: a couple of things. his family is believing him i know that's real but the other thing too, he didn't really try to prove his innocence. he was hoping that you shouldn't care whether i am guilty or not, you should just go with me systemic racism. i may be -- it's right he is hoping that that will make fact that he hoaxed people want matter. >> the jury -- the justice seems like it was done this evening. there are people who are beaten up on the streets because they are. there are people who are abuse because they are black or different than someone else. and for the sky -- i don't know this guy, i would assume his family would be supportive as any family would, but this
misappropriation of his labels and these accusations, it does nothing to advance the cause, and i think he at some level, some part of them genuinely wants to see equality in society and better treatment for people. and how he did and what he did, he got what he deserved from the jury. >> greg: but i think all with his ego can before a crusade or his desire for the betterment. what if, by chance, it becomes the victim of a real hate crime? call it the bully who cried wolf. what you think of that scenario? have you ever heard that before? >> yeah, i always thought it was weird to let the boy guard against the walls to begin with. talk about bad casting. >> greg: very bad casting. speak out no wonder he is a little weird. >> what happens if the wolf comes and he is a boy? spewing all right.
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♪ ♪ >> greg: her class claims she is a master, although her campaign was a disaster. hillary clinton is teaching a new master class on the power of resilience. a quality that have to wear the same pantsuit for 30 years. from unfamiliar, master class as a streaming platform where you can learn stuff and famous people their annoying -- a success would say. it is nothing like joe biden streaming which is brought to you by flomax. by the way, my master class is on overcoming the stigma of
being super hot. harold knows what i'm talking about. as part of the cause, hillary meets the victory speech she would have red hatchery one meant the presidency 2016. >> i've never shared this with anybody. i have never read it out loud. my fellow americans, today, we sent a message to the whole world. our values endure, our democracy stand strong. we will not be defined only by our differences. we will not be on us versus them country. in america, every boy and every girl can grow up to be whatever they dream. even president. our country has proven once again when there are no ceilings, the sky is the limit. >> greg: not so fast. so that is healthy, reading a
victory speech from an election that was five years ago that you lost and then making people pay for it. i have to admit, it's pretty good. we have been through a pandemic, we have lost relatives, jobs, and she is planning to come something that happened a decade ago almost. not being president is your greatest tragedy, then you had a good life. unlike -- washington general lots of the globetrotters a thousand times. you don't see them teaching a master class. maybe the general should try climbing the globetrotters or russian assets. slippers in first in a series called master class presents the white house. it is being followed by one form her very own husband mike about leadership. lesson one is how to fight interns cigar shopping. speak of that joke was a little much, don't you think? i did like the joke about you being super hot, though.
nice job getting harold ford jr. on the show, though. >> greg: thank you, god. he is one of our biggest fans. first, kat, what kind of master class would you teach? and do you think this was a mistake? >> me teaching a master class would be a mistake? >> greg: no. >> it would. i don't think she understands the concept either. it is not a video diary. >> greg: that is true. >> did anybody learn anything? is she intending to teach anything? and any of the stuff she said was laws too. like little boys & girls club know that everything -- if you can dream it, you can do it. well, you couldn't. but -- i can't either. it's not just her. it's everybody. there are so many things that i dream i know i cannot do. and that's true for everybody. it is false.
she doesn't get what a class is. you can just read your diary. but i guess they are paying for it. that's what i will do. >> greg: yeah. read from your diary. >> then i will lose my job. >> greg: harold, it's the money, right? >> look, i like her, and i like her husband. >> greg: you like everybody. >> there's no doubt they invite a strong opinion. i think, though, which he did in his speech, and i hear you about the video diary, but i think what she did is what we want i think for more people in public life. she is transparent, should give a window into her emotions. my wife watch the whole thing and she talked about on the mic in an honest way and a decent way it was over. she was not going to believe president but she believed that someday a young woman can and would be president. we can question whether or not there should be market. people doing these kind of things but clearly there is. i took her at her word, and i
hope those in the class got something out of it as well. we're laying to rest bob dole, one of the great legislators of his era and may be one the greatest of all time because -- there should be -- he brought to it patriotism. not comparing the two of them but that -- i hope kids or adults who want to walk away from it without lesson. >> greg: yet, going to cut that part out. no, leave the bob dole stuff. we like bob dole. all the other stuff, just cut that away. >> i have a different take. my favorite part of the speech was that hillary's proof that america is great is that they voted for her. that seems biased.
but kat's point, the point we are abusing master class. that just seems like a video podcast about failure. >> greg: i would watch a video podcast about failure. i do. it is the joe devito podcast. i'm kidding. do you have a podcast? >> somehow i have escaped without one. >> greg: are you sympathetic to it the way harold is? >> no, this is probably another classic clinton money laundering. i thought it said the power of resilience and i said they are showing -- there shutting -- >> greg: resilience. not brazilians. >> is to relate the power of resilience. of her complaining? watch adam schiff's master class on charisma.
please, just go away, go away. >> greg: i think the resilience, though, it's reflected in using something that wasn't used -- it's like say mike let's say your wedding gets canceled and you sell all the invitations on ebay. yeah, that is resilient. >> or you write a bunch of monologues and come out with a book called "monologues." >> greg: well, you know what, take that out too. coming up, now that cuomo is gone, lemon is left to soldier on? so ifor what i need. how about a throwback? ♪ liberty, liberty, liberty, liberty ♪ only pay for what you need. ♪ liberty, liberty, liberty, liberty ♪ what can i du with less asthma? with dupixent, i can du more....beginners' yoga.
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dumbest man in america. >> crime is rising. >> it's so bad. >> went out to a great dinner in new york city. >> the president is a racist and he said that magog. >> greg: welcome back to "dumbest man in america." don lemon is catching flak for -- lowering gas prices a whopping $0.05. he gives them credit for no longer being thanksgiving weekend. i know joe, don really did sing his praises. speak a big economic relief for millions of americans who have been dealing with soaring energy prices. cost at the pump, finally easing up. the national average for a gallon of regular falling to $3.35. the lowest. just look at that. >> greg: i guess the secret meetings with the white house asking for better press coverage are paying off.
i think he conveniently forgot those soaring prices energy prices were caused by the biden administration in the first place. it goes from russia to germany. appraising the white house for their apparent role in lowering gas by a fraction is like thinking your kidnapper for cutting off only one finger. not that i would know. don failed to mention that current prices are still way higher compared to what we were paying a year ago under tron. of course he never looked at those numbers perhaps because the white house told him not to. by the way, save money on gas by commuting to work like this. machi, the white house said please make positive news for us, and they did. >> what an amazing coincidence. in the spirit of
by parsons -- been low on inflation because you see a single earner could support a large family. and now i go to the grocery store and my food bill -- my fuel cost is up 50%. my electricity is up 20%. my rent is up 25%. and then you hear the consumer price index is up 5%. my, how are they figuring the number out? adding up all that stuff and weighing against seth rogen dvds. it took a long time to get to that. >> greg: it was a three hour drive to a half an hour trip. >> if prices had going on, we would be jumping on biden. if prices go down, shouldn't criticize him. the real issue is inflation. the economy is settling. we are resettling in our old habits and probably celeb a few months of this bread but the gas prices can come down comments two questions. it supply better or as demand
worse? i hope it does not demand worse. i hope it is applied being more plentiful because of demand is up -- >> greg: what you think i'm a joke? >> it's like the saying when life can gives you don lemons, he should change the channel. it shows you how out of touch they are. it's like a pirate who robbed you and slips you a coin as he sailed away. it is like yeah, this is very bad, but they are so out of touch. they are like a store that jacks up its prices but gives you a coupon for 27. well, you rate your prices 40%. >> greg: kat, i think he is filling the shoes of chris cuomo. or filling something. >> i thought it was condescending. i hate to sound like an elitist, but i don't think anybody considers 60 to $0.80 in savings when you fill up your tank to be a big economic relief. like a cause for celebration is not $0.60. also singing in general makes me uncomfortable. >> greg: he actually sang the
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>> greg: should men have the right to go out in strategy types? it is time for -- >> start learning mandarin, because we are over. >> greg: and the worst news i've heard since i found out instinct broke up, "the wall street journal," that's a paper, reports that it is now becoming popular for men to wear leggings even outside of the gym. and yet i am mocked for carrying a purse. journal cites numerous sightings of the man tights rate during a manic ranging from models and iguchi function show -- musicians won't get that. maybe they won't. i don't care. the article explains that the clothing item even has a name, meggins. devoted to the trend. for exclusive report we go to a
man right now who is currently wearing meggings. you are very fashionable. you have natural style, harold. you would not be caught dead wearing meggings outside, would you? >> i didn't know what they were until we were talking about it on the show. i don't have any problem with anyone wearing what they want to wear. i have been to one them, i probably won't, but if anything is a good shape and that's we like to do, go and then do it. >> greg: you are sitting on the fence which a lot of people wearing meggings like to do. fence sitting. it's the new curling. >> are you done? >> greg: no i'm not. i went to take a deep dive on this, kat. what would you do if your
husband started wearing meggings or has he started already? >> i think your attitude is very unpatriotic. >> greg: why? >> you know who wore meggings? look at -- you tell me those are not meggings i have the exact same pair. >> greg: he also owned. you racist. are you done? maybe i am. i appreciate you letting out with a wild accusation instead of admitting you were wrong. >> greg: i'm fairly good at that. all right. devito. you have the body for not meggings. that's my new brand. they are called not meggings. they are just pants. >> i always wore tights and gin because i don't like people talking to me. and i found it's a very effective deterrent. and i also like to get -- before
i head to the renaissance fair. >> greg: what was your role? >> i was a codpiece salesman. so showing off what i was marketing. >> greg: there was a const p salesman who got the ladies. or were you the fair maiden? joe, good to see you. look what what i'm wearing. >> you have to play a little flute -- >> you worked there, didn't you? >> greg: the next thing you know your mauling each other in a pickle barrel. >> i think it's a trend toward athletes or which we give up on wearing grown-up clothing. >> greg: every date we find a new way to be in public and long johns. in 20 years we are going to be walking around in a. >> i sure hope not. and i have the clods for those leggings or --
i prefer to stick to sweatpants because why would i want a tighter, more revealing pant when sweatpants are much more comfortable. as joe said, no one will make conversation with me and no one will try to rob me. because no one says oh, let's rub that guy and then they come up in there like he has sweatpants on. he doesn't have anything. he is crazy. >> greg: you know, that is the bank of america strategy, right? dressdown. walking around in midtown dressed like a homeless person and only the homeless people will try to beat you up. that's america. >> i am going to write this down. >> greg: yeah, this is not like "the five" is, harold? no more one more thing or a cute little dogs. or [bleep] like that. don't go away. we will be right back. ♪ ♪
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♪ ♪ >> greg: we are out of time. thanks to the great harold ford jr., joe devito, joe machi, kat timpf, our studio audience. "fox news @ night" with evil shannon bream is next. i love you, america. ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ >> shannon: hello, and welcome to "fox news @ night." i am shannon bream in washington. breaking tonight, the verdict is in performer empire actor jussie smollett. guilty on 5 of 6 charges. our panelists including the author of the book -- wing in on how much time he could be facing bonbons and whether perjury charges could be coming. plus, former chief of staff