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tv   Gutfeld  FOX News  November 18, 2021 8:00pm-9:00pm PST

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he's been going now for about two hours, 20 minutes. yeah. the house is supposed to vote on the build back better bill any moment now and remember, keep watching fox news, the latest updates, shannon bream will have them live at midnight. fox will be giving updates throughout the evening. that's all we have for us tonight. greg gutfeld, next. ♪ ♪ [cheers and applause] >> greg: yes! happy someday of the week again, i forgot! we got another humdinger of a program. what's a humdinger? who the hell knows. i had one removed earlier this week. thank god for salad tongs. it's funny how i managed to sit
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on things buried accidentally, of course. joining us tonight is matt whitaker. [applause] very, very athletic man, very athletic man. just got off a grueling workout. ♪ ♪ >> greg: woodell known fact, he shares a birthday with our very own kat, proving once and for all that astrology is about as real as joy behar tear. also joining us, julie banderas. [cheers and applause] glad to see her here given her antics last night. >> [indiscernible].
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>> greg: julie is something else. she'll drink all your rose as well as your rose be and rose c. speaking of a jumble of chaos and confusion, how about jen psaki? in an effort to play the race and the gender card, she ended up throwing her administration under the bigoted bus. following a cnn report on the dysfunction and the vice president's office, she told "politico" it all comes down to, you guessed it, sexism and racism. there's no question. >> secretary psaki: she is the first african-american woman, woman of color, indian-american woman to serve in a stop. woman, so many first, it's a lot to have in your shoulders. she is somebody who at a much higher level than the rest of us, but who wants to be seen as the talented, experienced, you
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know, expert, substantive policy person, partner to the president, that she is. but you know, i do think there has been some attacks that are beyond because of her identity. >> greg: so to quote the tsa agent who works the x-ray machine and spot of those objects in the shape of a summer squash and a melon ball scooper over the weekend, let's unpack this. it's a long way for that joke. cnn had reported there is growing infighting is an exclusive story, meaning it came from the white house. maybe cnn could have just made it up like the russian collusion crap but the story had too many integral facts coming from too many sources. the fact is if the white house wants a story out there, all it has to do is pick up bidens "sports illustrated" football phone and it's on cnn faster than on a powder doughnut.
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i'll take it. so when jen psaki claims that some attacks on harris are based on her identity, she's actually referring to the very criticism that came from the white house, meaning joe and his staff are having a problem with women of color. they are the whites of pharmacists! [scattered applause] how does that feel, joe? turnabout of play after your rittenhouse smear. he went to a funeral for a grand cyclops which is not a person with as it in the middle of their forehead, if the title of a higher up in the kkk, as in democrat robert byrd. he probably didn't even check his watch during that funeral. joe also made fun of indians before observing they only work in 7-eleven's, remover that? so jen has to be talk about joe but it's hard to tell since she unloads more crap than joe biden after three bowls of all brand. i know, that's another poop reference. was that too much, phyllis?
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>> greg met a couple more poop jokes tonight, is it too far? >> no it's not, i love his poop jokes. they are so great, i love them. of [applause] >> greg: can't argue with phyllis, she's a national treasure! [scattered laughter] >> greg: so whenever there's a problem with these clowns it has to be because we are all racist and sexist, right? it's never about their incompetence or callousness or loathing for average working americans, which is just another form of bigotry, a coal miner could finish a ten hour workday covered in soot and they would call him up for blackface. this is really about the vp in turmoil, which is the only kind of oil this administration will allow. time for the next chapter of... ♪ ♪ >> in search of kamala harris. ♪ ♪
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with your host, sarah jessica parker. >> greg: it has been a tough search so far but thankfully we were able to catch up with her earlier today. yes, we scored an exclusive one-on-one interview. >> welcome to the show, madam vice president. >> thanks, greg, it's great to be here, i love your show, especially the blonde girl, although she could use a sandwich, preferably a toasted one made with toast, using a toaster. >> greg: i have to say you do look like a toaster. >> i am a toaster, you believe! what did you expect? to have a human actually impersonator? because they didn't person ate her, they be called a racist and sexist. nobody wants to play kamala because they are scared [bleep] of being canceled, so it's just better to have a [bleep] toaster play here. you can't cancel it toaster. the only problem is, unlike
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kamala, toasters actually do their job. >> greg: about to ask you to watch the language, this is after all a family show. speak okay, mr. obsessed-with-poop. here comes a poop joke, poop, poop, poop. can you just stop for one when it? and what's with the nonstop drug jokes about kat? she is a wholesome, loving, healthy person with a strong moral character. you though are a flaming [bleep] >> greg: that voice sounds really familiar pair let's get down to this, what you think of jen psaki saying it's all sexism and racism behind a criminal schism that's being directed at you, ms. harris? >> what the [bleep] do i know, i'm a toaster. go ask the microwave. >> greg: thanks for joining us. so what did you expect? you think you really get an actual person to impersonate
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kamala harris? we tried to talk harris faulkner and up but she said dinner at fuddruckers wasn't enough. the fact is you can impersonate anyone except the protected classes designated by the legacy media, as if there is a do not disturb list. remember when "snl" forced poor fred arneson to impersonate obama and they made him so incredibly boring so as not to offend anyone. it's really the worst insult. we don't think you can take the criticism, which allows some of the biggest crooks to get away with anything. hell, some could even marry their brother. i don't harm talking about. it comes down to this, when in trouble, smear the others, when in doubt, call the bigots out, call them racist, call them sexist but never tell the truth. it's the difference between this white house on the previous one. who did trump go after? the media, china, the nba, the nfl, democrats and republicans, to liberties. he punched up, not down. he didn't single out citizens or voters.
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here the white house sees you, the individual, as the problem, and they see group identity as its protection. it's a racket. they are the victims, even when they're in power and you are not. if [scattered cheers] >> greg: let's welcome tonight's guests! in college he caught passes, now he knocks libs -- whitaker! she's more buzzed than it be shaving with an electric razor, fox news anchor julie banderas! he has crowds lined up at the box office asking about the refund policy. writer and comedian joe devito! and finally, her teachers encouraged her to run with scissors, fox news contributor kat timpf! you know, julie, i used to you are the biggest hot female mass
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i ever met, but actually, kamala harris is more of a mess then you are. >> actually really can relate to the story because i too lead a life entrenched in dysfunction and lack of... focus. but honestly i think it's a lame card to play when you play the race card here. i have said and i maintain from the very beginning, i believe joe biden picture so he would be the first president to put a woman in the vice president position, correct? but i think as far as her ability to do the job, mean, being a woman should be an advantage to her because unlike men, we can multitask, so that would mean if there was absolutely no excuse for her sucking at her job. >> greg: that was a jab at men. >> it's the truth. all based on facts. >> greg: i get a copy of dr. cook, you got to clean, you got to wash. >> i do none of the above. if >> greg: sexist would say that but i'm not saying that. >> i do none of the above, for the record. my husband does all of that.
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>> greg: maybe that's why you're a mess. >> or why i wear the pants, literally. >> greg: matt, welcome to the show. >> i always enjoy being on here, thank you. >> greg: you think they're actually defending her? it seems like -- no, this is -- he had. to extent, she is the first of many things, including having the lowest approval rating of any vice president at this point in time, and i know you like math. the real question is -- >> greg: plug your ears, kat. >> is joe biden pushing kamala harris 'us -- that's the chicken and the egg question. right now they appear to be blaming her. >> greg: executive. they're both in trouble so the blame -- it's you, it's not me. they're like those dueling spider means. >> they should have her look at the root causes of his lack of favorability. >> greg: yeah, she is the root cause of her lack of favorability. they don't like me. joe, you are used to that.
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when they say there's no rift, do believe them? >> they better hope there's a rift because kamala is ready to cut her. she was a real doctor. they're still mad about what happened at the debates. maybe it was a bad idea to pick your running mate to be someone who called you a segregationist over your opinions on busing and it's come back because now 40 years later he's throwing her under the bus so it's come full circle. this is what annoys me so much, they put so much stake in identity and the people of the left think like isn't it time for a woman of color to be considered for president and you say okay, well how about condoleezza rice -- look at the time, it's not quite the time! so it is so easy to go for these -- the racism, sexism, but when you pick identity over ability, this is what you end up with. >> greg: right, right. [applause] kat, about the interview -- the interview i did with the
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vice president was very strange. >> yeah. super weird. >> greg: exactly. very cool, very steely. she didn't cackle. >> no. >> greg: this should prove your point, that if you take this administration with all their experience, they are more inapt then an administration that had no experience. so you can't get better at politics. >> especially because jen psaki doesn't even realize how sexist what she said was. being a woman can be hard, but as a woman -- i am a woman, by the way -- i don't want people to think i'm going to be like totally incapable of basic competency. she literally said, listen, kamala would be better at her job, but she's a woman, so she can't. that's what she said, she said woman twice, the first woman, even as a woman. that's way more offensive than a lot of things i've heard. >> greg: yeah. and also it's like she's the first politician i've seen in history who decided not to do
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the job that she was -- she went to the border and then she just -- she just dropped -- >> kind of a power move. >> greg: she's worse than the cable guy, because the cable guy will be five hours late but at least he will fix it. she just -- she didn't fix it and she won't even return your calls. you never -- you didn't -- you know we called you about the border? you gave us a time between 12:00 and 7:00 p.m. to be home, to be home at the border and you never showed up. she says yeah, i'm on another call in france. >> but you know, greg, the real challenge in this situation is she had very little experience to be vice president to fix these problems, joe biden has all the experience and he can't fix it either so it really is just kind of -- again, this -- >> you think all those years he helped create them... >> he's like alcohol. that old line about alcohol, joe biden is this -- -- >> the cause of and solution to
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all my problems. >> greg: there you go. up next, college democrats delve into canceling themselves. [cheers and applause] ♪ ♪ bogeys on your six, limu. they need customized car insurance from liberty mutual so they only pay for what they need. woooooooooooooo... we are not getting you a helicopter.
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♪ ♪ >> greg: young dems don't get a pass when old tweets bite them in the ass. a bombshell reported -- impeachment of high-ranking numbers of the college democrats of america. it's the worst student scandal since i was caught in a dorm during a raid. that was last year. and i still haven't gotten them back. screenshots of their old tweets from adolescence have been circulating, which has led to ugly accusations of anti-blackness, islamophobia, and anti-semitism. it's gotten so bad they must cut
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ties with their college counterparts. and then college kids are so upset, they are using their tears to fill their. if the piece points out some college dems see it as a morally necessary reckoning with systemic racism, courts, while others see it as a bunch of college educated trying to play politics, which sounds like the term credit party. all this drama over resurfaced tweets from long ago, i wonder how far this will go. >> hi, you have a great resume, but you could you inflate to explain this tweet from 2018? who's in the mood for a little mexican? i think her name is lowe's aleta, lol? >> that was a joke, we were going to meet up for tacos. >> did you also write this sexist comment any yearbook i'm a had a in ap english, mrs. thompson was a bitch, have a great summer. >> that was when i was in high school and she was.
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>> isn't it also true you one soiled yourself while grabbing a woman -- >> no way! what is that from! 1970? i was a baby. i was a baby. >> once again in 1990, 2005 and just last week. >> oh... [applause] >> greg: joe, you look like a college professor, the kind that would hit on college students. why don't college -- doesn't it? for the accurate, right? with the beard, the salt-and-pepper beard. >> that was said in confidence, greg. i look like a professor that hits on girls at a community college. >> can we pause to acknowledge my incredible acting in that? >> greg: you're a natural those improv classes -- >> eight grand well spent. >> greg: this isn't a problem with college republicans, only
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college democrats. are you kind of enjoying it? >> it's wonderful to see them eating themselves like that, it's great. it really has nothing to do with justice or anyone's feelings, it's just a game of moving up in your status to see who can be more aggrieved and the idea that the democratic party would be cutting ties with them because, well, if there's one thing they won't stand for, it's bickering over race and identity issues, democrats certainly don't want any of that, so it's a lot of fun and remind me of the quote, it's a shame they can't both lose so i love to see them tearing each other apart. >> greg: kat, this is what happens when forgiveness is considered advice. if you actually say that was a long time ago, they go no, now you're going to be canceled. >> as far as i know, all of the college immigrants released statements condemning stuff. for the past two years, they just got lazy and now they're just condemning each other, which is a lot easier, but the only concern is that college democrats after a few years, they become grown-up democrats. and then they get jobs. maybe in hr.
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>> greg: it's always hr! >> it's going to be hr and we are all [bleep]. >> greg: it's strange, man. i thought this stuff would be localized in academia but no, it jumped out. it found its place actually in the corporate world -- a corporate world that is so desperate to virtue signal that they will buy anything, they'll spend money on antiracism ideology, crt [bleep] like that. >> it's not long, we're going through old tweets and old social media for these college students. it's not long before corporate america goes through every email you ever sent. saw that happen to jon gruden recently where, you know, his emails were licked. >> greg: the pictures i sent to you. >> well... >> greg: everybody -- i thought everybody works out naked. anyway, i apologize for that. but it is -- it's crazy because they are being hoisted -- what
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is it come on on their own petard. no one knows what it is. >> you can be hoisted on it, so it must be long. >> greg: not for me. it sounds like something that should be banned, julie. we should rise above this and defend these kids except you know that these kids would be the first ones to try to cancel you. >> totally buried >> greg: if you work at fox. >> i would cancel myself. i want to cancel myself. i'm so ineffective, i don't even know how i still have a job. but i'm so grateful, they surmise of how grateful i am there was no social media when i was growing up because nobody -- nobody has any record of all the stupid [bleep] that i did. if you have no idea. but i think it's interesting and i like the fact that they're very consistent in following in the footsteps of the democratic leaders in washington where they are leading a party of dysfunction, where it begins in college and then of course they become adults. they should actually look into kamala harris' office and see if she's hiring because i think
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there's a whole field of potential candidates there that she could potentially used to, you know, better her position. >> further her dysfunction. >> greg: exactly. the only person that is immune from cancellation is the least interesting people on earth. if there isn't something that you're going oh god, i hope that doesn't get out -- i don't want to know you. >> i don't have anything. if >> who here doesn't have a tape? >> greg: i got. >> i'm so thankful. >> greg: i just finally alphabetized. you were a master at beta. terrible! god, this show is getting dirtier and dirtier every day. they're going to have to stop it at some point. >> i don't understand any of it. >> greg: [cackles] up next is bill turning into a
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♪ ♪ >> greg: has dealing with the liberal loonies made him more like yours truly? bill maher is calling out his own side because they are sounding certified. he stopped by chris cuomo's show yesterday to discuss a wide range of topics. instead of kris' usual focus, which is bicep curls at apologizing for his brother. for those of you who don't know, bill hosts the show "real-time" and chris hopes to one day host a real show. he's been one of the rare voices on the left calling out the insanity in his own party, and the left has put up more resistance than hunter biden fighting child support. i'd like to give him a high five and by that i mean and in him a $5 bill while stoned. sounding more and more like someone i know, which has america wondering... ♪ ♪ >> is bill maher turning into
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greg gutfeld? >> greg: let's take a look at the evidence, shall we? first up, let's hear bill's thoughts on agenda-driven media coverage of hunter biden. >> something like hunter biden. if don jr. had done what hunter biden had done, it would be every night, all night, on msnbc. but the fact that it's hunter biden and joe is on the blue team -- that the problem with america, everything is so binary. >> greg: so where we heard that before? >> imagine if this were a trump offspring. i know that's a cliched question at this point, but it has to run to your head that like this -- i mean -- what your family went through every day because you are simply related to the president and then compared to what he's not going through. >> greg: i was less eloquent. clearly. and what about critical race theory, bill? let me guess, it's not a
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phantom? >> it's not a phantom either, something going on in the schools that never went on before. i'm not in schools. i have no interaction with children whatsoever. but i do understand this issue because i read accounts from parents, from educators. kids are taught and sometimes separated into groups, oppressor and oppressed. >> greg: and what see you? >> splitting kids into oppressor and oppressed. actually calling someone oppressor is not as bad, it's calling some of the oppressed because they will always be seen as a victim. >> greg: i rest my case. [applause] by the way. by the way, kat, i'm not trying to call him out on anything. this to me makes me feel good and also i realized that no matter what i say, i'm not reaching his audience, but he can actually take -- he can take whatever he wants from the show.
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whatever he wants and if he talks to his audience, i love him for that because he's reaching people we can't. >> i'm proud of you. that is such a mature attitude to have when you've been saying these things and he is saying them and getting credit but you're being so mature, you would never expect it from a guy with a show that's about 60% poop jokes at this point. >> greg: wanted to going to do poop jokes? >> i don't know but when he doesn't going to be impressed with his mature, positive, principle-based attitude. >> greg: when he says this duffy sound so much more sophisticated than me. >> there it is, there's the paranoia! >> i think you are just a much better actor. you don't need a teleprompter. it you a natural. think bill maher, i think he's not watching this show, is my guess. >> greg: he has. >> he's got people watching it for him. >> greg: that's what i think. >> he obviously knows that this works, which clearly does, but
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it was interesting, there was something he said where he said it goes be on policy and until we figure out why they hate us so much and beasley goes both ways, when he says because they hate you, they really hate you, we're never going to fix anything in this country until we love each other. i'm not really sure what is trying to save it is basically saying were republican's, democrats hate each other with you on the show practice every single viper keeping your friends close and your enemies closer. talk to your staff, we can all attest to the fact that you've put that lesson into place and which worked out quite well. >> greg: that is true, that is true. i don't know what she's talking about. whitaker, i've seen a wonderful trend. if it seems like the strongest voices on the left -- you know, dave rubin is one of them, glenn greenwald is another. you've got bill maher, you've got matt, you got that lady. >> mary weiss. >> nailed it! >> greg: but you're seeing -- you're seeing break people essentially trying to save their
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party and that's why i'm very positive about this i think. >> writes, because they are becoming the party of coastal elites and big city, lactaid drinking, white wine chortling -- >> there's nothing wrong with that! >> greg: did you say lactaid? or did i just hear that? >> lactating. >> i didn't say any one of those words. >> he's like i'm pretty sure -- >> greg: you said latte. >> latte! >> greg: i can't drink lattes because i drink lactaid because i'm lactose intolerant! why did you throw this in my face! >> julie heard lactaid. >> i think what you saw in virginia is going to happen in 2022. if they are panicked. because all they care about is power and enforcing their policies on an unwilling and -- america that doesn't want but they have new york city and in chicago in these big cities where crime is on the dash you
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know, escalating, all the types of things. so i think this is what they are trying to do, the trying to rally and talk some common sense, which is where most of america is right now. >> greg: that's true. joe, it seems to be transitioning. what else, as an expert in transitioning. what should be his next step? where should he go? >> his next up is we need to get bill maher a giant glass of water because it's taken him about two years to swallow this red pill. it is stuck in his throat. even guys like -- even joe grogan says but i'm a guy of the left. they still don't let go of that, i'm a leftist. it you're not a leftist anymore because what you're talking now is common sense. these are entirely reasonable positions in the problem is his party has moved so far away from what normal people think about anymore that it -- i think the time is right now for people who say look, we care about our country, we care about our
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families, we care about our kids. we don't care about drag queen story hour, that is a very boutique interest to worry about nonsense like that. we want food on the table and we want a happier future and that's what people care about freedom and personal responsibility, that's where we are coming together on that. >> greg: i thought you would like that is a gift. but you don't have to bring it up here. it was just something to do, i didn't know there were going to be drag queens dancing. anyway. >> by the way, i thought he said lactaid too. i thought it was a set up -- >> my iowa accent. >> these lactating liberals! >> that's a great book! >> greg: lactating liberals by judge jeanine pirro! wires! liars, lactaid or's, and liberals! pro police bills are the law of the land but [indiscernible]. ♪ ♪
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♪ ♪ >> greg: finally biden backs the blue while three of "the squad" say screw you. on thursday the president signed a trio of bills into law that expanded benefits for first responders injured in the line of duty and offer more counseling to police officers. by the way, a trio of bills is what i call my nightly hot tub. anyway. [scattered laughter] i'm actually a little bigger, but... here's joe acting like he cares about safety. >> president biden: when you look at what our communities need and what our law enforcement is being asked to do, it's going to require more resources, not fewer resources. that's why my administration is investing in the community policing we know works in the training partnership for law enforcement and our communities have request. think about what we ask of
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police officers, everything from counselors to law-enforcement officers to folks who have to take down the back. everything in between. >> greg: yeah, whatever. and there it is. after all those calls for defunding, finally the president admits what we all know. that can't happen. we need police the way joe needs a life alert. biden, not devito. these bills passed with nearly unanimous bipartisan support, one of the past last month, 424-3, sue who were the three dopes who voted against it? you have aoc, rashida tlaib and cori bush. you wonder what their reasoning for their vote was? maybe they thought the money should be spent elsewhere? /egal addresses may be? who knows. but the fact is they can vote against cops because they don't need to worry about security, they have their own armed detail and laugh in the face of danger, like these guys. ♪ ♪
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>> greg: so that's where those little fellas went. i turned my back for one moment and they slip right out. the door. matt, okay, are we supposed to be -- are we supposed to be thankful to joe biden for trying to solve the problem that he started by not saying anything during the riots last year, sitting on his hands, and now -- oh, finally. >> we shouldn't be thanking him. all they are doing is replacing the funding that they're going to fire officers for these vaccine mandates. if to some extent it's a net zero i think at the end of the day, if they really follow through with getting rid of all the law enforcement that are unwilling to take his vaccine but you know, i have such a high amount of respect and admiration for the men and women of law-enforcement, for first responders. they do the hard work, they are there, they are running to the sound of guns while everyone is running away.
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we can't do enough. the challenge, we can't federalize local law enforcement either. we need to support the families, obviously when officers are injured or killed in the line of duty, but at the same time, you know, we just can't federalize everything and make a massive bureaucracy out of local law enforcement. >> greg: you are often called a first responder, when so many leaves like a beer on a table alone, you are right on top of it. >> i never -- yes, never leave alcohol unattended. that's just a rule of thumb. >> greg: never forget, as you often say about booze. >> absolutely. i got to say this, it is about time, it's about time the president stands up. i bet the far left is going to go absolutely berserk, the fact he's actually finally standing up for law and order, taking crime seriously and finally the police officers whose hands have been tied behind her back literally by the democratic officials in all of these democratic cities that have literally restrains them from being able to crackdown on crime, they also help a cracked
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on the homeless crisis here in the city. i don't know if you heard, i'm homeless recently, i'm wearing kat's shoes and my friends moms water and i was planning on speaking on bryan llenas 'us house tonight, your producers are putting me on a hotel. >> greg: you fallen on hard times are you've been drinking hard times. they used to be a whiskey called hard times. the stuff in here that i don't even remember, rolling around, i don't know what i'm saying. but -- >> you look at the three geniuses who voted against it, maybe they thought it was to fund show cops now available on fox nation. >> greg: well done. >> it sounds like a good idea to think -- did they crunch the numbers and realize that more police might have an impact on fighting crime? the problem is the genie has been let out of the bottle. they cannot stuff it back and because how do you say to communities and criminals that oh, you can no longer just wheel out carts full of beer now, that policy has changed, so this idea
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that you can just decide what society we are going to obey or not, it's not going to work, they've empowered the criminals, they did worse than defund the cops, they demoralized them, so i'm not optimistic that this is going to turn out well. >> greg: kat, i'm actually guessing you read the specifics of the bill. >> i did, actually. >> greg: tell me more. >> i will. the bill that the three of them voted against was actually built specifically to increase mental health support for police, so i don't understand why they would vote against that, especially if they say they are so concerned about, you know, policing -- you know, what is the alternative mecca cop is like hey, i'm really struggling mentally and you just say, you know what, too bad, you and your gun, get out there! i don't understand. >> greg: it's like -- you know, police send a social worker to a domestic call but don't send him to the cop was depressed. >> make sure the cops have no
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mental health help. that's the best idea of police or form i've ever heard. what are you doing! >> greg: i don't know. >> neither do i. >> greg: up next, and alcoholics dream come true, a river that flows [indiscernible]. ♪ it wasn't me by shaggy ♪ you're never responsible for unauthorized purchases on your discover card.
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♪ ♪ >> greg: nature may be full of
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glory a spender but my favorite, this river on an alcoholic vendor. a town in smells kind of funny -- funky, all because a river got a little drunky but will drinking from this river damage your liver? i don't even know how to say this, our river in a while who was part of an alcoholic contact of up to 1.2% alcohol by volume. that may seem kind of low, especially for, you know, you know who. but it was enough to make the entire area smelled like beer, which led to the water getting tested in the first place. authorities say the issue may stem from a spill from a drainpipe at a beverage factory, but we think this video of julie banderas vacationing in hawaii may provide a clue. >> oh god. [laughter] >> greg: that's where it came
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from. >> because i didn't have a drink in my hand, anytime i do a back bend i make sure to hold my drink properly. >> greg: in the first block you are doing a back bend. i didn't even notice that, that's her whole thing when you're drinking, back bends. >> i can drink upside down, upside right -- laying down. i'm not that impressed with the numbers here though, 1.2% alcohol by volume? testing my swimming pool string filter i would've gotten a much higher number. it also gives me a great idea, actually, kill two birds with one stone, efficiency is my middle name, so i like to, you know, perhaps at the beer to my pool over the summer and then i don't have to get out of the pool every 5 minutes to refill my glass. >> greg: i was thinking but the same thing. it's genius. if this didn't exist, why haven't we invented something. lazy river amusement parks, how about lazy drunk parks? >> i think the beer gets a little flat but i was amazed at the story also, we think it might be the beverage warehouse
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upstream. we don't know. [laughter] i wonder what else it could be. >> greg: i don't know. kat, it could be people -- >> anything is possible with god. >> greg: and god created it. >> he did turn water into wine. >> greg: it also could be pee. >> that's what i first assumed, especially because it was a story that you selected. >> greg: i did select that. >> but i was wrong. >> greg: i will take that over the other stuff. joe, what you make of the story? anything strike your fancy? >> yeah, well -- did you know that aloha means hello, goodbye, and this river smells like [indiscernible]. >> mcwhirter weird thing to have happen in your hawaiian vacation, you think it would be a tropical river with little umbrellas floating by and you're like the great god michelob was the one made this happen? >> greg: hawaii is a weird place. i've been there once but ever since that brady bunch episode
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with that -- i knew ahead of time you had -- he had the tarantula, you had the evil take it out. >> i've never been to hawaii and i'm way too young for the brady bunch. >> greg: i'll tell you what, you and greg brady would have hit it off. >> i don't get it. >> greg: what was i going to say? it tiki and then you had the tarantula and then what did you have? vincent price, right? wasn't vincent price or my getting confused with the grand canyon one? the hawaii one was he was in the cave! he was in the cave! [indiscernible]. that's good too! >> are you smelling like burnt toast? [scattered laughter] >> greg: i guess that means i should shut up. i'm going to go home, i'm going to find that old episode. oh, man, i'm going to put the suds in the bathtub, little rose, a couple of my ducks.
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>> i'm coming over. >> greg: those ducks don't talk. don't go away, will be right back. ♪ ♪ claire could only imagine enjoying chocolate cake. now, she can have her cake and eat it too. nexium 24hr stops acid before it starts for all-day, all-night protection. can you imagine 24 hours without heartburn? >> man: what's my safelite story? my truck...is my livelihood. so when my windshield cracked... the experts at safelite autoglass came right to me... with service i could trust. right, girl? >> singers: ♪ safelite repair, safelite replace. ♪ - [narrator] it's a mixed up world. and the way we work looks a little different. but whether you embrace the new normal or just want to get back to the routines that feel right,
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(jackie) i've made progress with my mental health. whose resumes on indeed so when i started havinga. unintentional body movements called tardive dyskinesia... i ignored them. but when the twitching and jerking in my face and hands affected my day to day... i finally had to say, 'it's not ok.' it was time to talk to my doctor about austedo. she said that austedo helps reduce td movements in adults... while i continue with most of my mental health medications. (vo) austedo can cause depression, suicidal thoughts, or actions in patients with huntington's disease. pay close attention to and call your doctor if you become depressed, have sudden changes in mood, behaviors, feelings, or have suicidal thoughts. common side effects include inflammation of the nose and throat, insomnia and sleepiness. don't take austedo if you have liver problems, are taking reserpine, tetrabenazine, or valbenazine. austedo may cause irregular or fast heartbeat, restlessness, movements mimicking parkinson's disease, fever, stiff muscles, problems thinking, and sweating. (jackie) talk to your doctor about austedo...it's time to treat td.
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td is not ok. visit askforaustedo.com. >> greg: we are out of time ,-comma thanks to matt whitaker ,-comma studio audience ,-comma i-pronoun love you america peerco >> shannon: welcome to fox news at night, i'm shannon bream in a busy washington. the true cost of the social spending bill and democrats got now going on three hours on the house for tonight, let's listen in.

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