dealing with less, the syndrome of being cooped up. let's hope that bringing back alcohol doesn't lead to a drunk jimmy failla. >> neil: we don't want to go there but i am ready with a smartphone in case he does. abby, jimmy, thank you both very much. this is something to look forward to. blues on flights. here is "the five." ♪ ♪ >> i am shannon bream with katie pavlich, jessica tarlov, jesse watters and greg gutfeld. it's 5:00 in new york city and this is "the five." growing outrage over reported plans to give cold hard cash to illegal border crossers. according to "the wall street journal," the biden administration is in talks to pay up to a billion dollars to illegal immigrant families
separated at the border under former president trumps zero-tolerance policy. each person set to get a payout of up to $450,000. republicans say that plan cannot move forward. >> you break the lawn you get amnesty with democrats. now they are going to pay you for breaking the law. you would think that we have a problem coming towards the border and what we've seen since the last several months. wait until word gets out that you get paid for breaking the law to get into the country. >> in -- income frantically stupid idea passing on half a million dollars to people his first act in this country was a violation of our law makes no sense at all. >> is going to be a slap in the face to every hardworking american who works hard and plays by the rules and it will especially be a slap in the face to people that have immigrated illegally to this country. >> shannon: congressman dan clark -- contract tweeting their
next of kin gets a insurance payment of $400,000. let that sink in. house republicans sent a letter to three cabinet secretaries behind the plan demanding answers. jesse, you brought this up yesterday. we weren't sure. it's real, it sounds like. >> jesse: he pays you to break the law. he feels you out. he bails you out. didn't he stop building the border wall and then build the border wall around his own house? he put the kids in cages. the same cages he got mad at trout for putting people in. the same cages he built when he was vp. i think he spies on your bank account if you have -- if you haven't broken the law and then put a half a million in your bank account. he fires you from working pays
you you not to work. and then he says that's not the dead of the night. it's early in the morning. oh, my god. this guy has shattered the all-time american record for illegal entries and then blamed trump. there was a reason we remember why we had to separate families. donald trump was following the letter of the law. you cannot hold adults and minors in the same facility. you can't hold minors for more than 21 days. he had to separate them to see if they were actually parents or thieves or kids getting traffic. it did have a strong deterrent effect. do you remember when there was a guy who came to the country, i think it was 11 times illegally and then murdered an american woman in a sanctuary city. kate steinle. she sued san francisco and the federal government for damages. the federal government wouldn't pay her. they said no. they're going to pay it illegal to come over here. we have been separated from our
families. we were told we couldn't see our grandparents. we couldn't see our grandparents, couldn't do that. couldn't say goodbye to them in their deathbeds. couldn't hold a funeral. what do we get? a check for $200? people get half a million. it's crazy. it's crazy. >> shannon: and now it's time for a commercial break. just kidding. jessica, this will be tough messaging if the administration stands by it. >> jessica: i do not want this to be the lead message for the midterm elections. we'll see if it comes to pass. a lot of these things are proposals that exist and they never come to fruition. everybody gets hot and bothered about it and then nothing happens but it's important to say we had 5,000 sets of parents or guardians, whether they were related to the kids are not, separated. there is still 1,000 kids we have for you not -- we have not
reunited them with their families. that sparks outrage on both sides of the aisle. nobody wants that situation. 940 plaintiffs. the aclu has made it clear it's a minority of the 940 that would get any kind of settlement. not saying that i think it's smart to go ahead with this. this isn't like thousands and thousands of people getting half a million dollar check. >> jesse: its reparations. >> jessica: a lot of people don't think reparations are a bad thing. >> shannon: bent toward the border is close but there will be those who argue it will be further incentive. in cases where they say that there is the parent and a child, that's close to a million dollars. it's a dangerous journey. it's almost like we are putting them in the most dangerous game show ever. >> greg: who are you talking to? >> shannon: people. who wants to answer?
>> greg: the whole key is you cannot allow this to be framed as a democrat versus republican. you can't allow it to be framed as an immigration question and you cannot let this be framed about separation. this has nothing to do with immigration. you don't want to get trade down that hole. this is about draining the power of america. it's so far left. there's a reason behind it. if illegals get a half a million per illegal, we are done. that means they can keep doing this and keep doing this and this is how you train a country. your opening, turning on the faucet and everything goes out. the only solution is for americans to sue the government. we have to start suing the government over the perceived mistreatment of a democratic white house. the afghanistan debacle. surely there could be lawsuits over that. let's talk about the response to
the riots. we can sue the democrat cities. how about inflation? the separation that you brought up. there are people who lost their loved ones. they weren't there in the last moments. that is way worse than any of this. a lot of them were separated for the children's own good and we can't forget that. it's a bigger story about dismantling america. it's not about immigration. this is the craziest idea. it goes beyond that. i thought it was a joke. reading enough twitter, i'm going back happy right. sounds like something you'd get on a far right website that you have to check 100 times. >> jesse: it's like nab libs for liberalism. >> shannon: are we incentivizing something incredibly dangerous for these people? what's the message? if you were in a desperate situation, economic or whatever
persecution situation, why wouldn't you -- carol the reporters down there talking to caravans of people say we are coming because joe biden said they could come. >> katie: incentivizing a criminal cartel. people in the middle night, however they say other relatives. they have taken away every single tool we have two disincentives not to bring the law -- not to break the law. joe biden said we could absorb too million a year. on the issue of the separation and paying families who were separated, the first thing i would say is it's a reflection of how the left feels about the american citizen. if you're an american citizen and you commit a crime, you were separated from your family sometimes for very long time and sometimes they put you in prison. there is no money for that and
there shouldn't be. the idea that people who break immigration law, coming to the country illegally making a federal law get a huge check of $400,000. no one else gets to do that if you're a citizen. there are tens of thousands of unaccompanied minors voluntarily separated from their parents in el salvador, guatemala, they were sent alone on the journey and they already separated. it's a way, as greg said, to drain the system. it's a reflection of the distain the left has for the american taxpayer and that you should be paying for rule breakers. >> jesse: hotels illegals have standing to sue and reap these damages? >> katie: legally they are allowed to seek asylum. >> jesse: suing for damages if they're not citizens? >> shannon: if they say that they are here and being held
against their will in a situation less than ideal, they can sue over the conditions. lawyers have organized on their behalf. >> jesse: gitmo detainees consume? not all of them. >> greg: there is no justification. >> jessica: they did not fight their way to getting to gitmo. >> greg: it's not about separation. >> shannon: president biden hamming it up with european leaders as his spending plan sputters here at home.
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>> need a little bit more than an iou. >> of luke bamboozled. this is not like god was coming today. >> we need to keep the promise that was made. >> progressives have done our work and getting everybody to a place where we endorse the framework that the president laid out. >> katie: jessica, as the demo kite at the table, do you feel bamboozled by what's happening right now on capitol hill? >> jessica: for wants -- i think there has been a tremendous amount of progress. two weeks ago we were talking about how we're going to end up with the 1.5 to $1.7 trillion range. that's what joe manchin told joe biden he was up to. now ro khanna, the width of the progressive caucus, telling neil cavuto, ten days it will be done. there is a lot that progressives should be happy about. i think the attitude should be
versus nothing, you're getting a whole lot of something. everyone will get onboard. nancy pelosi doesn't mess up. it doesn't happen. she knows where the boundary lines are. she knew when she endorse the framework that it was going to work, and biden knew as well. he was going to come back to a rosier picture. >> katie: shannon, it was either really good idea for the president to make this announcement and leave and let them hash it out. or looks bad because it doesn't look like he's really involved as they continue to talk about what may or may not happen. >> shannon: because greg has child care issues, that's why greg jr. is sitting with me. it's a huge gamble. you really put pressure on your party because you're leaving and saying i expected to be done by the time i get back. the first was by the time i land. like you said, speaker pelosi doesn't mess up in the sense that she's always very aware of what the whip count is, her vote count. she's not putting something on the floor to watch it burst into
flames. we'll see how she does. it puts the spotlight on how much sway the squad does or doesn't have. they lost a lot of what they wanted in the bill and they are finding maybe it's easier to campaign on social media and tick-tock than it is to get hundreds of members of congress to agree to anything. it may be a little bit of a reality check. >> katie: there is a game of chicken going on. progressives are holding infrastructure hostage. democrats are saying that we voted on a infrastructure bill that was bipartisan and we are not going to vote for it unless you cut the spending. someone has got to figure it out. >> katie: there is too much money on the line. >> jesse: their claimant army. hundreds of billions of dollars for a little army. aoc. paid activists to fight for the progressive wing of the party. that's big. we have bureaucrat day care, elderly care, government run
everything. everything is free. you've got to take it and rock with it. they slipped in amnesty, green cards for silicon valley. it's a lot. plus, they triggered with the bottom line numbers. they took 4 trillion and cooked it down to under 2 trillion. fooling around with the sunset clauses to fool the moderates. i muffled by it. everybody knows the games they are playing. biden is an old man, he has been in the senate forever. he knows how long he can wait to get it under the wire. they will slip it in under the wire and they will get something eventually. >> katie: greg, now that we have little greg, i am sure that you are for child care spending. >> greg: finally. the topic is the far left is threatening to sink the biden agenda. i think the pope is not that powerful. this pope's far left, let's not forget that. i refused to fall for this
bifurcation, this scam of the squad versus joe. that's only being done to make joe appear more moderate. oh, my god, look at the squad. they are so far left. this is exactly the same framing that they did with the spending bill. $3.4 trillion. oh, my god. maybe 1.8 doesn't look so bad. it is the parallel. the squad is the 3.4 and joe is the 1.8. they appear moderate. we are all getting screwed. i didn't realize that they still have the army and there. that's almost as much is our military. incredible. >> katie: saying that they are trying to pass joe biden's agenda. people like joe manchin are getting the way. greg is right. democrats in panic over the virginia governor's race that could have major implications.
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and that's the kind of change you notice. talk to your eczema specialist about dupixent, a breakthrough eczema treatment. ♪ ♪ >> jesse: democrats getting very nervous over next week's virginia governor's race a new polling spelling disaster for terry mcauliffe. the republican glenn youngkin surging ahead of mcauliffe. mcauliffe not left with a lot of options to turn things around. the deeply unpopular kamala harris is set to campaign with him today. she continues to claim the outrage over education in this state is fake news. >> how are you going to work with those parents who have concerns about how things are being taught in schools? >> let's be very clear. this is all generated by glenn
youngkin. trying to define the tactic. it's a racist dog whistle. i hate it. it is pitting parents against parents and parents against teachers. >> jesse: speaking of racist dog whistle. what did they do? they put a bunch of what white guys tiki torches? >> katie: the diversity box. you've got to have a woman, person of color. they allowed -- at the event in charlottesville four democrats tied to the virginia democratic party showed up in the same khaki pants, tiki torches with the tags still on them, the same white shirts and random hats. the media picked up on it and said look at these white supremacists who showed up to back glenn youngkin. twitter did it's thing and conservative reporters caught on it. they are twitter profiles.
maybe some of them work for them a campaign. they deny it. >> jesse: not the most honest campaign. >> katie: i'm sure they'll be calling the fbi to track down these white supremacists. they blew it. >> greg: running around. >> jesse: this does not sound like a competent campaign. >> greg: biden showing up did not help. like a guest who shows up and throws up at the buffet. we are seeing is an amazing phenomenon. parents are woke in a good sense, they are woken up. they had no idea for the longest time how much contempt for teachers unions teachers in the whole educational system has for them. their intent is to brainwash the kids.
this is the positive aspect of kobe. that's where the parents learned all of this, at home. they saw how left-wing very teachers were, they hate the kids and they hate them. it's not just about virginia. it's a education problem writ large. it's time to wrestle control from this monstrous monolith. everyone saw it at home. >> jesse: according to "the washington post," education is the top issue in the race. >> shannon: we've seen the school board meetings, suburbs of d.c. it makes you think that the doj memo that came out talking about potential threats, hasn't blown up on democrats and the administration. parents were already upset. feeling like someone was coming after their first amendment rights. it has been a backlash for mcauliffe ever since then. parents have said not only do you have these things that i disagree with that i am supposed
to sit down and shut up? numbers have continued to take down for mcauliffe. >> jesse: he has a lot of momentum, glenn youngkin. predictions? >> jessica: i think it's going to be within the margin of error. statistically tied. >> greg: you are making young greg angry. >> jesse: it works. >> jessica: two other polls. youngkin up 3. mcauliffe up one train for the education question is fascinating because mcauliffe is down 15 points with parents who have kids ages kindergarten to 12th grade. virginia is not as blue as new jersey. phil murphy is in a tighter race than he would like. new jersey will stay blue. if it becomes a wave, this education voters. the expectation is that we have jobs in the economy. that becomes the number one
issue. there is going to have to be a big reversal in terms of messaging coming out about it. republicans, youngkin has been smart. he campaigns alone. he has fund-raisers with high-profile republicans but when you go to a rally, you see glenn youngkin and the democrats are going to have to pay attention. we have nationalized it but if it doesn't work in this scenario, then we've got to think about that new model for a republican race. >> jesse: you have a lot to do. little greg is going to host the next segment, so stick around. >> tech: when you get a chip in your windshield... trust safelite. this couple was headed to the farmers market... when they got a chip. they drove to safelite for a same-day repair. and with their insurance, it was no cost to them. >> woman: really? >> tech: that's service the way you need it. >> singers: ♪ safelite repair, safelite replace. ♪
>> jessica: welcome back. first up, bruised by a series of bad headlines, facebook is rebranding its name as meta. mark zuckerberg dropping an absolutely insane demo video. >> are you coming? >> i've got to find something to wear. all right, perfect. >> hey, mark, what's going on? >> jessica: practicing for the big day. may be handling situation. next supported, demon face intact. greg, why doesn't mark zuckerberg ever let somebody else speak for facebook? >> greg: what you just said is absolutely right. there needs to be somebody. he's the guy that you keep in
the back with the great ideas but you never let them out front. if you wanted to make a movie about an alien pretending to be human, that's the movie. i wish i could change my name. i wonder can you be canceled in that world? if you get canceled, go to that simulation and live a different life. >> jessica: jesse, when they hired sheryl sandberg, i thought that that was supposed to happen. sheryl sandberg who are such a popular name-brand and has the book would be the person to do the demos and answer questions and things like that. >> jesse: are going to change her name for bad headlines? i would've changed my name years ago. fox would not be called fox if every time we got bad headlines we changed our name. that's a weak move. stick with facebook. it's like changing coca-cola or nike. you're not going to have people
calling it meta. you can't teach an old dog new tricks. i feel old watching this. they are creating this whole universe. i downloaded my first app last week. >> jessica: they are arguing that this world already exists. facebook is just getting meta-about it because this is what's already going on in this incredible world they have created. >> shannon: he says you put on the glasses you can enter a world where you can connect with more people. you're doing it wrong if you're strapping something plastic on your face. it takes us in the wrong direction. bonding and having experiences and communication. it's weird. >> katie: mark zuckerberg is reportedly a big fan of the sims game and now he has his own. i liked his video flying across
the lake with the american flag much better than this. >> greg: it's going to happen. >> jesse: are looking forward to it? >> greg: yes. i am a misanthrope. i prefer robots and dolls. >> jesse: and i think you like -- >> jessica: are you challenged -- i am getting separation anxiety. i might sue you. >> jessica: if you are going to dress up for halloween, make sure you get the costume right. new york city mayor bill de blasio learning that the hard way after mixing up key "star trek" characters. >> this is my own mosh to captain kirk. i want to remind everyone of the prime directive live long and prosper. with candy. beam me up. >> jessica: on tuesday we get to vote for a new mirror. de blasio apologized for claiming to be captain kirk
while dressing up like spock. katie, are you a trekkie? >> katie: i'm just glad that the mayor was at work. this is weird. i don't know. do something else with your time. >> jessica: is weird that no one on staff mentioned the color issue. >> greg: he is obviously stoned. that's the only time blue will ever get near him. he is not captain kirk. he is captain jerk. i would like to beam him up. >> shannon: if you claim to be a trekkie, you wouldn't make that mistake. does he need to take off anymore constituents? you come off as so phony. it's one thing if you're like, i don't know about this stuff. they handed me this. but then you do this?
>> jesse: if you mess up with something as small as putting on the wrong shirt, think about the big things. prime. losing $900 million. this is obvious why he is such a screwup. he can't even dress himself. >> jessica: finally, a lot of buzz over a "new york times" piece titled 37-year-olds are scared of the 22-year-olds. millennial bosses claiming to be uncool. researchers are calling this the "kids these days" effect. i mentioned i'm 37. i have gen zs working for me and they do scare me a little bit. >> shannon: i am a gen x. here's the great thing, when you progressed to the next level, you will no longer care if these people think you should part your hair down the middle or stop wearing skinny jeans. using the wrong imo g. if you are scared of your 23-year-olds, review should not be the manager of the business.
i don't know. things change, every generation changes, the way the workplace works, benefits, things are going to happen. i want you to know it's going to be okay. >> greg: i am old school. they have to be terrified of me. can't be the reverse. anybody who is scared of their young employees does not deserve to have a job. this is such a "new york times" style piece. did you hear about this trend? vicky told me this. it's not really a trend. one person at pilates. one person at their hot yoga class was talking about this in "the new york times" spins it into a trend piece and it has no effect on anyone. >> jessica: it was that this whole cycle it was neat. you know the word?
it is a gen z language. a >> jesse: don't think "the five" staff is trendy. >> greg: insults to the young kids on the staff. >> jesse: do you think johnny is trendy? do you think sanders is trendy? >> greg: they are well dressed. we have a well-dressed staff. >> jessica: they can cut your mic. katie, take us home. get us out of this. >> katie: never let gen z see you sweat, millennials. >> jessica: i guess i messed up that segment. fan mail friday is up next. as i observe investors balance risk and reward,
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answering your questions. a bit of halloween going on. what keeps you awake at night? jesse, does anything keep you awake at night? now that you've got a baby. >> jesse: don't say the baby? >> greg: say concerns about your baby's future. the questions that the baby asks about climate change. >> jesse: i have to read something. media relations is asking me to do this. i feel like i have to. i first retraction in quite some time. johnny is trendy. sorry. i stand corrected. >> greg: jessica, what keeps you awake at night aside from that little thing inside you. i'm talking about the baby. >> jessica: she's not fat little. i'm going to have a big one. the urge to go to the bathroom, related to the visitor.
>> greg: you are peeing for two. >> jessica: feels like three or four. nothing really. i live in an apartment building. neighbors coming home, that kind of stuff. >> greg: is it weird you can hear other people? you can hear them flushing toilets. >> jessica: they are in the shower. >> greg: katie. little greg. >> katie: now i have this. a whole segment, i'm terrified. i will think of demons all night long. >> greg: shannon coming your mind is filled with positive thoughts. >> shannon: i cannot shut my brain off at night. i play word games and crossword puzzles. it takes a lot for me to shut my brain off. >> greg: what keeps me awake are the screams come from my
basement. hemmer is so loud. instagram question. what frightens you the most? shannon. what frightens you the most? is it death? is it carbs? [laughter] >> jesse: demons. >> shannon: typical stuff. i am not a fan of bugs. i don't like engaging in conversations with strangers. complicated and filled with minefields for its fork strange people on subways. >> jesse: not going on the subway ever again. rodents of all kinds. rats, mice, varmint, possums, raccoons. >> greg: katie, what frightens you the most? >> katie: nothing more frightening than an amtrak
conductor. terrifying. where's your ticket? >> jesse: they are very serious. >> katie: they are really scary. >> greg: conductors feel like they have more authority than maybe they do and nobody questions their authority. going to throw you off the train in the middle of nowhere, jessica? >> jessica: not me. you skipped me. the best for last. clowns. nothing scarier than a clown, as carrie bradshaw would say. >> greg: look what happened to her. i don't know what happened to her. >> jesse: rich and famous. >> greg: what frightens me the most: world poverty. the climate getting warmer. >> jessica: thank you for taking this so seriously. >> greg: you people make me sick. "one more thing" is up next.
♪ ♪ >> shannon: time now for one more thing. katie, kick us off. >> katie: special reported one more thing from our friends at fox weather. before you go trick or treating this weekend download the fox weather app. free for all iphone and android devices. amy freese is here to give us the halloween weekend forecast, amy? >> i thought we would start off by what's brewing across the country for what's actually been a greatening week for parts of the country. we start out west where we had the big bomb cyclone finally dry witch hazel. bone low 50's. spooky spots across the country halloween. santa ana winds set up for the
west nice breezy conditions into skull vail, arizona. that's probably the best trick-or-treating in the whole country. snow possible in parts of the rockies. that's the only place we see snow on halloween this year. >> we have quiet in pumpkin center the central plains after it's been very wicked there much of the week. big foot, texas hot so anybody looking for the revealing costume situation that's where we will see things get steamy for halloween and lots of globulins getting all goodies in candy town. indiana where it will be 60 degrees. we put up satan's kingdom wet weather in the northeast continues. could be flooding rains, very soggy for the pumpkins, kill devil hills all the way down the eastern seaboard to screamer, georgia. guys, we are ending up october with, perhaps, the busiest october for tornadoes that we have seen in history. it's been a wild week of weather and getting in on the halloween fun looks better as we head into the weekend. >> katie: get your costumes. amy freese, thank you for that
report. ready for halloween. jesse? >> jesse: we know what candy is all about. it's about chocolate. i'm not going to talk about other stuff sugar, we are talking chocolate. i have ranked -- this is basically the official halloween chocolate candy ranking, butter finger number one. by far -- excuse me? >> shannon: no. >> greg: oyou are so wrong. >> jesse: don't do that let me finish. twix number 2. kicks number three. hershey bar got to have the almond. reese's peanut butter cup. butter finger better peanut butter candy than reese's peanut better cup. if you have a problem with the ranking screw you. or instagram there he is. here i am ranking the candy. see it and steal it and smell it. two instagram and weigh in.
>> shannon: eat them all and weigh in. >> jesse: "watters' world" we do a soros investigation. the definitive one. >> greg: yes. >> shannon: all right. see you this weekend. greg? >> greg: first of all thank my man jerry for new shirts, gutfeld number one on television. he made a new logo for me. he didn't like the other one for me. made a bunch of these. all right. tonight, i got gutfeld 11:00 p.m. exclamation point amanda her dad wrote dirty harry and apocalypse now. jimmy, comedian extraordinary do this quickly. ♪ animals are great ♪ animals are great ♪ animals are great ♪ all right. take a look at this raccoon. don't get scared, jesse. on the beach stealing chips. there you go. that's why they wear those little -- what do you call it?
>> katie: bandanna? >> greg: i don't know anymore. just shut up. >> shannon: so we want to take just a minute here at "the five" to wish a very happy birthday to john and rita this is the 80th birthday for both of them. super big fans of the show very patriotic. john is a retired u.s. navy reservist. four children, three of them are in rotc at villanova. proudly served in the will army. great grandchildren, too. we know you watch all the time we wanted to say happy 80th. >> jessica: i can't read a prompter. we had jesse's crappy recommendations on candy and now talk about amazing girl in 11th grade in older she every year makes do costumes for baby in the nicu at the wendy palmer hospital for women and babies. superman, bat girl, wonder woman.
the incredibles. takes a lot of time for her to make each of these. she calls it a labor of love. >> jessica: i do get it, greg. it's so sweet. everyone trick or treat safely. have a great holiday weekend. >> shannon: i want to see picks of all of your. that's it for "the five." have a great weekend. >> bret: good evening. i'm bret baier, breaking tonight president biden calls a major diplomatic blunder by his own administration clumsy but does not apologize to one of our oldest allies on this, the first day of his trip to europe where the president will attend major conferences on the economy and the climate. the second catholic president in u.s. history, history visited the pope today at the vatican amid calls from some bishops that president biden be denied communion. all of this comes amid the political chaos surrounding the president's domestic tax and spend agenda back