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tv   Gutfeld  FOX News  August 23, 2021 8:00pm-9:00pm PDT

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california adventure with you but this just broke. andrew cuomo just commuted the sentence of the father was imprisoned for, what was it, murder? oh, sorry, it was just robbery of an armored truck, it wasn't murder. it turned fatal though. unbelievable. we have to turn us around, my friends, we will be l.a. tomorrow, tune in, "gutfeld!" is next. ♪ ♪ >> greg: people around them are wearing masks to keep from throwing up. [scattered applause] ♪ ♪
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>> greg: talking to myself! happy five days from friday, everyone! hope you all had a relaxing weekend filled with great friends, delicious food, or in julie banderas' case, a night in the drunk tank. >> yeah, well, there was a storm. i had to have a lot of dark and stormis. >> greg: i bet you did. i wonder, is this the greatest immolation i've ever seen? >> this is the greatest humiliation have ever seen. biden's botched exit in afghanistan is the most astonishing display of gross incompetence by a nation 'leader. vietnam oaks like a master class in strategy compared to joe biden's catastrophe. and it didn't have to happen. all he had to do is leave the soldiers there until everything is out. our citizens, our weapons, then you bomb the hell out of the
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bases. we have five bases and you say bye-bye. >> greg: bye-bye! [scattered applause] let me ask you, do you think that general patton was woke? i don't think so. >> let me ask you, do you think that general patton was woke? i don't think so. you know what woke means, it means you're a loser. everything woke -- everything woke -- it's true. everything woke turns to [bleep], okay? >> greg: [laughs] i'm sorry we had to [bleep] and what of biden? do think they would have covered it if i fell in the air force one? >> do think they would have covered it if i fell in the air force one? he fell three times. down goes frazier, remember that? they kept going down and up and down and up and i said what the hell is going on -- i was
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watching that. what's going on with our president? i did the ramp, the long slippery ramp and i said general -- it was pouring out, pouring. i said general, this is a bad deal here, i've got leather shoes on the bottom and i'm going to fall. i'm not going to let them -- so i walked down tiny little steps. what's wrong with the president, the biggest story. normally they have like some little groups, nothing, it was like ice getting ring. i think it was a trap but with him falling down the stairs three times, he was down, no he's up, no he's down again, my god. he's up, he's down again, he's down for three times. if that were a fight, they'd stop it. [scattered laughter] >> greg: you know, we don't deserve him. but that wasn't the big news. the big news, you didn't hear, because it doesn't align with the legacy media 'has highbrow corruption infused narrative. accorded to the fbi there was scant evidence the january 6 capitol riot was part of a plot
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to overturn the election. we knew that, you knew that. all it took was one look at the role-playing insurrectionist to tell you they were more interested in organizing a game of "dungeons & dragons" then a government coup. there was far more evidence to overturn the election on hunter biden's laptop, but it didn't lead any newscasts because like one of hunter's laptops, it was one of those stories that just disappears. for seven months, hacks lectured us on the big lie. hacks have been wrong more times than chris cuomo playing patty-cake. they screamed insurrection every day, it being worse than 9/11 or the civil war combined, except it was as preplanned as biden 'us evacuation of kabul. while biden yakked on about evil trumpers, he completed bypassed a mass mass evacuation of americans and allies fearing it would signal the imminent collapse of the afghan government, which is kind of exactly what happened, the collapse of the afghan
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government, as well as biden's presidency. so like his spouses been cheated on, we've been lied to an awful lot, about masks, inflation, law enforcement, china, race, whether our president has enough mental capacity to dress himself. and god forbid we question it from morning blow to don lemon, they reserve their disdain for you, the person who dared question the liars, meanwhile they are to realize, some of the most meat headed are related to the liars. the swirling swamp mixture of media and government elites gave us afghanistan. as well as bedridden grandpa joe from willy wonka, who is now our president. and what are they really trying to cover up besides our maskless faces and their -- the realization that they covered up a mess of a war so that it would continue. with been part of a divisive game they created to keep us powerless. it's us versus us, so it's never us versus them.
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if the construct of democrat and republican as distinct leaderships turns out to be as fake as the teeth in the president's mouth. afghanistan is a perfect example. an overwhelming majority of left and right wanted us out. if the war is the only thing less popular than chrissy teagan. yet it lasted 20 years. even the spice girls couldn't last that long. they tried. and it was made possible by the lie that since our politicians were behind it we had to be too, and maybe for a year or two or three, we were. but after that we filed it away as something are competent government is taking care of, which is like trusting your kids with uncle hunter for the weekend. oddly, we were putting our trust in institutions run by mouth breathing morons who hate you buried george w. bush's cia director requited a photo labeling trump supporters are taliban and replied good idea wanted twitter user suggested sending the "maga-wearing
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unvaxed" on a plane to afghanistan. that's [bleep] on their an aristocracy of [bleep]. if president biden was saying it was always saying this is a bad war, war he backed strongly. so minutes to put smelling salts in a pretty woman's hair so when biden sniffs if he wakes up to reality. but a president before him was different. that was trump. he said it before he even was president, he knew it was becoming a waste of blood and treasure, these foreign wars, so once again biden is like that student that cheats out the smarter kid sitting next to him and yet he still gets an f. but the swamp didn't care, but the swamp didn't care so biden came along and pulled out the table across from under the table from out under the table, falsely thinking everything laid on top would magically stay in place. that can only be done by someone who knows what they're doing. now the taliban is giving us a deadline. seriously. how is it up to them?
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but maybe with the clouds we have in power, they are. [scattered applause. >> greg: let's welcome tonight's guests! she has three kids, one for each cheek to the wind she is right now, fox news anchor [indiscernible]. he's done more men on the street then kat has dated men on the seats. she shatters the glass ceiling with the sound of her voice. fox news contributor kat timpf! and hedge trimmers are his nail clippers. the nwa world champion, [indiscernible]. oy vey, julie. >> i say the same thing. >> greg: i don't even know what it means, i feel like we
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just graded the new taliban army with the largest transfer of weapons in history and it's like we're just watching this happen. >> what's really weird is the present was watching this happen but never even said anything about it and then when he finally did say something he's like i knew what was going to go [bleep], but i just thought i would sit back and watch it go [bleep] and then once it went [bleep], how many is that so far? i'm trying to [indiscernible] tonight. all night long. and then finally he comes out and says yeah, no, we knew this was going to happen, it was going to be planned badly. >> greg: it completely contradicts what the military brass were saying where they said we didn't expect this to happen and he goes oh, i did. of it's like where these people, lawrence? we were talking in the green room, there's a big difference between trump and biden when it comes to dealing with people like the taliban. >> it's crazy! i know crazy, going to my mom, that's all i date, is crazy.
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trump scared a lot of the world leaders, he scared the taliban. they didn't like them but they were afraid of him. he made them pay up. look, the leaders know they can get whatever they want out of biden, he's not going to make them pay up and get him to go along with their foreign policy. the same with the people writing the note card, everybody gets -- who is writing the note card? who's putting the notes on their? all the think tanks and all that -- so now we have a leader that is incompetent that he doesn't know what to do. i'm no doctor, but you see what you see. and it's become a tragedy for the country. you know the most sad -- the saddest part about all this is the fact that the brits and the french are getting their people out and our president is saying just get to the base, if you can just get there -- going to be people, they're going to be checkpoints, they may kill you, they may murder your family, but just get this. >> greg: they're acting like you're trying to get to the jfk airport in rush hour, right? leave extra time.
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try to get to the airport two hours -- two hours before the airport, and don't use any of those cabdrivers, tyrus. it is interesting that the decision to leave afghanistan is universally popular but yet joe biden still screwed it up. >> you know, we have a lot to unpacking her monologue with got to start at the beginning of course, it's always great to have some straight talking and one of the things that i used to -- i used to agree with people at president trump and his twitter stuff was annoying it it defeated the purpose or whatever, but the one thing i missed was straight talk. >> greg: right. >> he just gave us the most concise plan for how he would deal with afghanistan. we are still waiting for anything from the woke administration. the problem is that we have a moderate democratic president who is under it woke administration. so they're more concerned with saying things like stranded and
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words opposed to actual actions. i don't care what you say, american it is postponed from being there? is that better than saying they're stranded, that there's three groups and we don't even know how many there are of each one? american citizens, afghans who helped us, and then you have ones with work visas were trying to get to -- how many do we got left? no clue, no anything. all you have to do as long as you answer woke and worry about optics, you don't have to give the american people a plan. this is just another example of the woke at ministry's not realizing that americans live in the real, real world and focusing on stranded as a talking point and your major news networks are having concerts -- concerts. if you needed information this weekend on what happened, you weren't getting it at cnn unless you wanted to hear bruce springsteen song, you know what i'm saying? the two hour interviews beforehand. meanwhile, people were throwing babies overalls trying to get their people out. i mean it's just -- that's where
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we're at, it's a woken administration. >> greg: kat, what to make of this -- what to make of this -- what trump did was that he told her what the order -- of the it would have been, which would have been successful, and what we are seeing is the exact opposite. have you ever had less trust in your government then now? >> no, honestly. i was get upset about paying taxes because it's my money, but now i'm going to be more upset knowing that the last few times i did it i helped pay for an air force for the taliban. >> greg: great tweets, great tweet, said like i wish i had the same second member writes that the taliban already has! >> i can't -- no. i cannot have a gun in new york city, but i can be forced to purchase an air force for the taliban. which is why i mean it just -- one of many examples of why this narrative of, you know, you don't want to pay huge month of taxes you are some kind of jerk. like no, it would have been
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better if i was just allowed to keep that. >> greg: it's fantastic -- that blows my mind. we just created an incredible powerful army. >> it's all because of the media though. i mean, if you had a legitimate press -- i'm going to pull a greg like he does on the "the five." >> greg: nothing going, blame me. >> if they would have taken him through the ringer and gone through policy position during the campaign instead of just allowing him to sleep in the basement every single day, then we would know where he stands on these issues and unfortunately they didn't do that and now we've got him. >> greg: now it's just -- and you know what, it's not went to go anyplace better. i know that we are not experts in this, we are not experts in the military and so you always feel -- but we can talk about this, why is it that experts in the military are doing better? >> it's common sense. >> why isn't our president listening to experts in the military? i don't say he should get his advice from me or you.
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>> greg: god forbid. >> i don't even like the generals. >> he's not taking any military advice. >> greg: up next, he was the master of the jeopardy board until his comments struck the wrong cord. ♪ ♪ tums vs. mozzarella stick when heartburn hits, fight back fast with tums chewy bites. fast heartburn relief in every bite. crunchy outside, chewy inside. ♪ tums, tums, tums, tums ♪ tums chewy bites as someone who resembles someone else... i appreciate that liberty mutual knows everyone's unique. that's why they customize your car insurance, so you only pay for what you need. oh, yeah. that's the spot. only pay for what you need. ♪ liberty, liberty, liberty, liberty ♪
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♪ ♪ >> greg: he spent a week as host now he's toast. yeah, it's been a train wreck replacing trebek. you thought he hit the daily double, but old comments got him in trouble. chuckle. producer mike richards is out as the new permanent jeopardy host. apparently he made inappropriate remarks about jews, women and other groups on a podcast which were dug up by a writer for the ringer.com. that's got to be the worst thing a man named michael richards have ever said in public, am i
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right? [scattered laughter] please buried him what's with that name richards did a statement said "it's humbling to confront the terribly endorsing moment of misjudgment, thoughtlessness and insensitivity from nearly a decade ago buried going back now, there is no excuse of course for the comment i made on this podcast and i'm deeply sorry." richards did tape a few episodes is hosted they will air next month and for now we will remain as executive producer. as for the new host, the barberton seems to be the internet's choice. my vote is for betty white but she will never pass because of her racist name. but if you look hard enough, you can find something terrible from everyone's past. if they want someone who is never tarnished by the past actions they should just hire hunter biden, right? our own kat timpf was also in the running until this video surfaced. >> yeah, i think i'm a shoe in for this jeopardy job. let me call you back, after
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dispose of this guy i murdered. [faint laughter] [awkward silence] >> greg: there was actually security camera footage of that too, should we play that? here you have it. when this breaks it's going to be a big deal. i'm extremely worried that this might affect your career, kat. generally when you murder people, you've been pretty safe. this is really the first time that you've done this -- >> got too comfortable. >> greg: you got too comfortable in your murdering. >> my version of ptk and the floppy disk. >> greg: that's true, that's true. here's my problem, lawrence. he did say a lot of crass things. >> he did. >> greg: it's where that we know longer accept apologies. the guy apologized and we can't move on from that. he's on a podcast saying mass
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things, that's it. >> on the wrong person to ask about this because i'm the type of person -- i like dark humor. i like all those type of comedians, so i would be banned because i laugh at their jokes, i'm a part of a problem. number two, i think the people that are part of the canceled culture, they are very vengeful. they wait till you rise, and unable to cancel you. it's not enough to say hey say sorry, they want to make you suffer. the third thing i found very interesting if they are going to let him be the ep still. like no, no, he's too good, he knows how to make a star, he just can't be the face of the franchise. >> greg: exactly. >> meanwhile, people don't understand it as the producers behind the talent that makes the show. >> greg: not so fast! [scattered applause] how dare you! lawrence! you're a rising star! >> a lot of good producers. >> greg: tyrus, it's really the host that makes the show.
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>> is that what you're going with? [scattered laughter] okay, we will stick with that, i will stay in grazing land, why not. i don't know this guy from adam. nothing about him is interesting to me. >> he is kind of bland. >> he is kind of bland, but you realize if you would have committed a crime back then, served his time for an actual crime -- >> greg: yes. >> when this brought it up, i served my time, i'm sorry i assaulted those three children outside the school bus but i did buy three years and i moving on and people would be like yeah, you're right. he was crass on a podcast. kat, have you ever heard tyrus -- the fact that this was allowed -- and shame on him. for the ep, how about you say i made some mistakes ten years ago, kiss my ass, add that to it. write that in the show. >> that would make it interesting. >> the apology was -- i hate -- i was told the kids if you ain't
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sorry, just take the whipping, because it's less i've got to hear. but the point is you don't get to say i'm extremely humbled and i'm sorry even though it was a decade ago. make up your mind. it was a decade ago. get over it. >> greg: and that's the thing. here's the lesson, kat, why apologize if it doesn't matter? he lost the job even after apologizing and we saw this with the bachelor dude and we see -- if we know longer accept that as currency, then screw it, don't apologize. i will never -- -- >> don't ever admit when you're wrong, that's my motto. julie is huge on gaslighting. >> don't ever admit when they say you are wrong. >> yeah! absolutely. >> it doesn't do you any good because now they talk about that woman -- they're talking by her being the host of it now, and it didn't take long before mother jones headline, who is
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mayim bialik, a terrible choice for jeopardy host. decades ago, you know, had some questions about different vaccines, maybe some concerns about birth control pills, so nobody will ever be good enough. this guy said some creepy weird stuff. i mean, if somebody i was working with was like is that picture view is that of your -- yeah right, no picture of me has boobs in it. >> greg: your point is taken, he would not be a guest on her show. >> he's bland. >> greg: he's bland and he's cheesy. he's like a generic form of cheese puffs, not the quality kind, just the kind you, you know, get in a vending machine at a private air plate. >> you just saying this because he's white? >> greg: yes. you know what, julie, i love all these reporters i like -- cnn treated the person that harpoons this guy is like a [indiscernible], he broke an unsolved >> i know.
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>> uncovered a deep dark secret. no vetting whatsoever, so kat could have totally got the job and that's how she got this job clearly because you didn't that her. >> you did not vet. >> greg: if i knew half the stuff i knew now about kat i would not even be in the same room with her. >> i just inc. you should own it, like a i have alleged in the question, have you taken naked pictures -- who says that besides from like a breastfeeding child, so i don't know. >> he breast-feeds! >> guy get vetted every time i come in the building. >> greg: i'm getting vetted right now as i sit here. it's quite -- anyway. i've got to move on. my brain is not working. nice working on "the five" though, tyrus. >> thanks. >> greg: up next, they hate a man who was smart and black because he refuses to be a
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liberal hack. me old story for years. trying this. doing that. spending countless days right here. still came the belly pain, discomfort, and bloating. awful feelings she kept sugar-coating. finally, with the help of her doctor, it came to be. that her symptoms were all signs of ibs-c. and that's why she said yess to adding linzess. linzess is not a laxative. it helps you have more frequent and complete bowel movements. and is proven to help relieve overall abdominal symptoms belly pain,discomfort, and bloating. do not give linzess to children less than six and it should not be given to children six to less than 18, it may harm them. do not take linzess if you have a bowel blockage. get immediate help if you develop unusual or severe stomach pain, especially with bloody or black stools. the most common side effect is diarrhea, sometimes severe. if it's severe, stop taking linzess and call your doctor right away. other side effects include gas, stomach area pain, and swelling. could your story also be about ibs-c? talk to your doctor and say yess to linzess. could your story also be about ibs-c? heyyy! (steins breaking)
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♪ ♪ >> greg: does the brother from south-central have liberal media going mental? the media must be terrified, for they are treating a conservative black man like is in the ku klux klan. according to the "l.a. times," california gubernatorial candidate larry elder is the black face of white supremacy. of course that only makes sense if you are a stupid jackass. elder -- the article was the usual trash talking session which when black activists on the left and black activists on the far, far left. to the liberal media, that's called covering both sides. two normal people, it means the left is boobs, there's that word, running ella forney into the ground. gavin newsom is hanging on by one hair gel slipped hand. judging by the new probe into his finances and estate in amida coming after him with everything they can dig up. just take a look at this clip
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from cnn's puckered fish or jim acosta. >> larry elder has made a number of disparaging remarks about women. what you listen to this, let me ask about this on the other side. >> when you look at all these women who have marched from something like 2 million women, donald trump has probably gotten more obese women off the couch and in the streets working out then michelle obama did in eight years. >> that's not entertaining, that's disgusting. what he said is discussing. in tens of thousands of hours if that's the best you have, you don't really have anything on larry elder. [scatterplots] >> greg: yeah, jim, if there's one thing democrats can't stand it's a governor who disrespects women, you idiot. and that, by the way, was a classic roast joke. the good news for larry is liberals can be very forgiving. after all, democrat governor ralph northam, who wore black face next to a guy in a klan hood, still has a job. come to think of it, so does
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ebony enthusiast sarah silverman and jimmy kimmel. looks like there's a lot of black faces on the liberal side of white supremacy too. i'm going to shut up now. tyrus and lawrence, you guys can have a conversation. >> wow, greg. just wow. i think we are missing the point here. >> i like when he does this stuff. i really do. >> you guys are black, i'm going to go have a smoke. i'm going to be honest though, in my lifetime and growing up as a kid, i never thought that white supremacists would appoint a black man as the head of their charter. i mean, that is progress! we've made it! david chapelle, even david, they still made him wear a hood. you know what i'm saying, what's the premises have come a long way and i would just -- like you guys -- >> we made it! we everywhere!
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>> greg: you're taking all of the jobs! >> here's the deal. i'm not larry elder's man, i think it talks fast, i can't stick with him. here's the deal, i don't agree with his politics but i would never question him as a black man because of what he thinks about fiscal responsibility, money, and policy. it has nothing to do with the color of his skin but everything to do with the person doing that reporting and attacking him because they can't beat him intellectually and it's the desperate attempt when you scare somebody and they come down, the last thing they got is a little ignorant broken heart and all they could do is say look at him, he's uncle, or he's ugly [bleep]. that's all they got. that's when the argument is over. and they try to bring you in. he's clearly not going to fall for that, but that's is a lot more about them than him. >> i agree with everything tyrus said, but you've got governor literally black face, literally, he can do this and then you've got governors all across the country now and mayors that are democrats, banning people from going to restaurants if they are not vaccinated.
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when you see this happening across the country, this is desperation. this is the democratic party realizing they are losing black folks. they are taking our civil liberties away, they don't care about -- they are allowing violence to just run rampant and it has nothing to do with liking larry elder, you can choose on the black conservative, somebody that's a libertarian, go vote for the democrat, i don't care. it's just a matter of they are losing on the grounds and how they're him. >> greg: i think they are scared, julie. >> yeah. >> greg: i think the democrat party is scared. >> i think they are afraid of a black person disagreeing with them and actually take the other side, which i think is absurd. every time some at he takes a sigh that is a little bit against something they believe, critical race theory, a lot of people in this country believe it's b.s., teachers included so if a black teacher speaks up against it, she's going to be considered a what's a premises? i've never heard of such an awful use of using the race card against a black person. >> it's a control. there's a lane that we are supposed to be in. he's uncle tom, i'm uncle tom,
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we are freethinkers and we don't want governors paying our way. that's not the norm, you need us. >> i still got my street grade. >> i'm a champion. my hat is backwards, [bleep]. nothing has changed about me. nothing. >> greg: i would like to see any of these activists who were quoted say this to any of you. because i don't think they would last more than three -- >> they won't last very that's not how they work. it takes courage to confront, its ignorant courage. >> greg: kat, it must be hard for you as the face of what's a premises to see that it's being handed over to somebody else. >> just go with it. >> look, i am not an expert, but he looks black to me. i don't have a degree in it, but the woman who wrote this article in her bio says she writes about diversity, she's an expert in diversity, but i'm surprised she
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doesn't know that, you know, the phrase -- we talk about black people, that actually represents a group of unique individuals that have unique perspectives as individuals. >> yeah, all right. >> i didn't even need to get that degree. >> greg: coming up, will tesla's new ai make boring jobs gon- bye-bye? ens. try claritin cool mint chewabls for powerful allergy relief plus a cooling sensation. live claritin clear. i don't just play someone brainy on tv - i'm an actual neuroscientist. and i love the science behind neuriva plus. unlike ordinary memory supplements, neuriva plus fuels six key indicators of brain performance. more brain performance? yes, please! neuriva. think bigger.
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so what's going on? i'm a talking dog. the other issue. oh... i'm scratching like crazy. you've got some allergic itch with skin inflammation.
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♪ ♪ >> greg: in case you forgot, tesla made a bot, but will these new androids become cheap labor on steroids? elon musk, if that's his real name, made plans for a humanized robot that operates the same ai software is tesla driving cars. i wonder if it beeps when it backs up, a little car humor there. relax, audience, i don't want you to fall out of your chairs buried elon says it's meant for dangerous, physical jobs but also boring, repetitive tasks
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like writing for "the new york times." don't think the robot apocalypse is happening anytime soon, they're only 5 feet 8 inches tall, so i tower over them. and at 125 pounds, it is designed to make us all feel fat but i guess like the locks on his bridge, they were designed to be quickly overpowered. [scattered laughter] that was a long road for a satisfying joke. so is the sick limbs into humanity's future? will robots become the new working class or is this just some big publicity stunt? after all, instead of showcasing a working prototype, tesla hired a dancer in a costume and this is real. ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ >> greg: it's good to see don lemon finding work to supplement his income. the robots will be put to good news, like hosting jeopardy. at this point -- at this point
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they are the only ones without a troubled past. or are they? beep, boop, boop. it's wrong but it feels so right. >> what the hell is going on here? >> what is none of your damn business. [scattered applause] >> greg: so i think we can pretty much figure out if we catch the robot having sex with a toaster, that's the end. >> or the beginning. >> greg: yes. >> i'm not worried about this, i am inspired by the confidence of elon musk. there's no progress other than he knows what it's going to look like, it's going to look like a human, which doesn't take much
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creativity because we already do have humans and know what those look like. so i mean, good for you, and i think i'm going to start trying to do that. i have a book coming out. >> greg: he is -- do you? >> no. [laughs] >> greg: so i have this theory, and i'm not going to go to tyrus because he always shoots down my theories. my theory is since the sub is about the death of actual labor, it will now be an option to lift things, so raises the question, will there be an arms race for your robot? so it's no longer whether you and i can fight, it's whether my robot and take on your robot. seat -- i've been thinking about that -- >> that was really deep. it made no sense. i thought it was interesting that musk describes the human replacement bot as such and this is what sold me. human level hands, i love that.
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and it's going to eliminate dangerous, repetitive, boring tasks, so with that said, i'm wondering how this technology might affect like you know, the future of blowup dolls or husbands, because white -- you don't need either. it's going to wipe out marriage. >> greg: it's like what pornography has done to -- i won't get into it. lawrence. let's talk about race. let's talk about race. >> why not. >> greg: robots, there's no going to be no racial component to robots. >> why the white uniform -- the white leotard? it's a racist bot. >> but they had was black. >> greg: the covered every base. >> i don't like this at all. >> greg: the international, lawrence. >> the one thing i've got is everybody loves chocolate. you start putting robots out there, you're going to steal from my thunder. look, i am scared -- no matter -- >> that could be the name of
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your book. >> i see the fan club already! >> greg: it should be joan jonessing. >> i knew this was coming. i know the robots were coming. i just wanted to be dead before. so the only solution -- okay, all right. after the chocolate series. okay, so the only way i'm down for this is what if i volunteer for them to put the robot parts on me? because then i'm still chocolate -- >> greg: it you're still chocolate. >> i'm just wrapped in metal. so i'm down. i volunteer. >> greg: half man, half machine. >> aren't we all? terminator. >> as long as we have -- >> greg: a cup of water. >> i ain't sweating know robot, if it gets mouthy, boom.
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my problem would be -- not for the latest, because they will download the model and then guys will get a virus and you get the nagging virus. you know what i'm saying, the criticize everything virus, you know what i'm saying, every time you want to get pizza, they are like "you really think you should be having -- be dumping -- that's all the reasons why you don't want a robot. the good news is they are so close and they had to use a dance model is that not happening ever. the fact that everyone was getting nervous about it just shows how spoiled this country is that literally there will be somebody who will have a safe space talking about fear of the incoming humanoid robot doing our job and dancing better than all of our sprite commercials, what are we going to do? in there like when is it coming emetic facts don't matter, it's here. guys, don't worry. i got it. >> greg: cup of water, can beat the entire robot force with just a garden hose, awesome. up next, did mothers hit the
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♪ ♪ >> greg: did the pandemic blues make mom's to booze? a new study finds that mothers with more than one kid with drinking 323% more between the
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start of the pandemic and the end of last year. i'd give them more precise figure, but i was drunk too. bottom line, drinking was up across the board in 2020 but spiked the most with mom who had kids under 5. researchers even interviewed one mother who had been boozing so much that she had no idea that the pandemic even existed. we went to her for comment. [bleep] [scattered applause] >> what an idiot. >> i have so much to say about this. >> go for it! >> i think they want about this study completely wrong. first of all, i want to know of the 323% increase how many of those functioning alcoholic moms -- by the way, nothing wrong with that -- aa is for quitters, and i have a random list that i don't have time to go through as to why i drink as
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much as i do, but i want to know if those functioning alcoholic moms had working husbands at home, because that number would have tripled from my professional opinion, because of my husband would get out of my basement, i probably would drink -- well, i would still drink, but maybe not 323% -- >> greg: [laughs] you hate your husband! >> no, no, i love alcohol. >> greg: kat, i did the math, basically 323%, it's basically like going from 0 to 3 drinks. talking about day drinking, which is not a bad thing! day drinking is the best kind of drinking. >> it's a great thing. it's also not my fault. i drink more during that -- like it didn't -- it didn't just last a month or two. it kept going -- it's like yeah, because we were still locked down! i'm sorry, but you don't let me go anywhere, i'm going to go somewhere in my mind. i feel like i should be able to write off all my blackouts on my taxes. >> greg: i like drinking in
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the daytime, lawrence, because it turns the day into two days. because you can sober up and then drink again at night. >> a little soda in there, or a little whiskey, but i believe the story. i believe it because the moms have to deal with the bad kids. now i know why they were really upset with the teachers union. it's because they made them drink -- they have to experience with the teachers have been experiencing all alone. your bad kids. >> greg: being around these brats, they make you drink. you have any thoughts? >> i'm going to take the bullet for the team, of course it was the pandemic! can women just have one glass of accountability? the dads don't get to say the pandemic, that's why we are drinking. they can't say that it's the drunk wife making us do all the chores in the house and yelling at us because they were going to be prom queen and they had big plans and they ended up with you. like that's not fair, no one else takes accountability -- >> on the couch. >> sleep on the couch with a
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badge of [bleep] honor! i take responsibility for my actions! i am so sick of every time women do something there has to be -- 320%? pandemic had nothing to do with that! nothing! it's what happens when you've got to be home for more than four hours, you drink wine and criticize every buddy the house. >> why is he married and i'm not? >> greg: [cackles] >> i know she don't watch the show! i'm shawshank right now. but it's real, man. it's her own fault, quit blaming us for everything. we didn't open the bottle. usually yes we do. we have to open a bottle, pull the cork, pour it for you and bring it to you. >> so now it's our fault? >> it's always our fault! >> i uncork all the bottles daily, i don't need help. >> you didn't make her feel pretty and didn't listen to her! >> well, dear, i felt
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unattractive. [indiscernible]. >> greg: don't go away, we will be right back. ♪ ♪ an liberty mutual save you? one! two! three! four! five! 72,807! 72,808... dollars. yep... everything hurts. only pay for what you need. ♪ liberty. liberty. liberty. liberty. ♪ [relaxed summer themed music playing] ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ summer is a state of mind, you can visit anytime.
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>> greg: all right. thank you. lawrence jones, kat timpf, tires, studio audience ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ >> shannon: hello, and welcome to "fox news @ night." i'm shannon bream in washington. breaking tonight, new images of u.s. marines on the ground in afghanistan. a chaotic evacuation operation. why do things stand right now as people are still desperately trying to escape from the taliban control. we have life apart from overseas where it is now tuesday morning. under pressure, president

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