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tv   The Daily Show With Trevor Noah  Comedy Central  January 13, 2021 11:00pm-11:46pm PST

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see, whenever you have friends in the area, your little compass there tells you where they are. it's pointing up, because jesus is your friend. - thanks, dad. distancing show, i'm trevor noah. today is tuesday, the 8th of december, which means christmas is only 17 days away. and if your kids are sad because they can't go see santa at the mall this year, you can recreate the experience at home. just have them stand in line in the living room for two hours and then tell them santa took a lunch break and they have to leave. it's the same thing! anyway, coming up on tonight's show: trump finally leaves the oval office, we look at the top tech of 2020, and busta rhymes is on the show. so let's do this, people! welcome to "the daily social distancing show." >> from trevor's couch in new york city to your couch somewhere in the world, this is
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"the daily social distancing show" with trevor noah. >> trevor: let's kick things off with mount everest, it's the reverse grand canyon. everyone knows it's the highest mountain in the world, but turns out that, like seth rogen, it's even higher than we thought. >> if you were planning to scale mount everest anytime soon, it just got a little taller. after a decade of dispute, china and nepal agreed on how tall the peak is, they agreed to add a meter. it now climbs 29,032 feet, means it is almost three feet taller now. >> trevor: turns out mount everest is almost three feet taller than we thought before and technically almost four feet taller when you factor in its new afro. here's my question, who is stretcstretching the measuring e all the way to the top of the mountain because when i measure anything over 20 feet, it always
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lets go and flies back in my hand. imagine this person's bravery. turns out mount everest isn't just taller, it turns out that it keeps growing taller partly because of all the dead bodies from failed climbers that keep piling up but also because the tectonic plates are pushing into each other and pushing the mountain up. so as mountains get older, they get bigger. but as people get older, nay tend to shrink. i guess that's just one more way that mountains and people are different. mountains are bigger than people. huh. and can i just say, measuring mountains, i didn't even know that was a job. measuring mountains sounds like the worst possible job in the world. you have to climb up to the snow and -- i'm glad my mom didn't know measuring mountains was a job when i was a kid because she would have definitely use that
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to punish me. trevor, you didn't clean your room when i told you to clean it. you're goings measure the -- >> no, mommy! >> mountain! >> please! >> again. >> aaahhh! >> trevor: speaking of things scientists still can't figure out. donald j. trump. he's only president of the united states for another six weeks but that's still plenty of time for him to embarrass everyone in super random ways. >> president trump walks out of a medal of freedom ceremony leaving the recipient shrugging and at a loss of what to do. >> thank you, thank you very much. thank you, everybody. appreciate it. ( applause ) >> one more question about the nog rawings. >> thank you very much. >> congratulations, sir. he's gone.
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>> trevor: guys, trump has checked out from the presidency. right now he's got the energy of a t.j. maxx employee on his last day. you know when you're walking in, excuse me, do you have this in a large? no, try kohl's. do you want to check in the back? i already did. i mean, this guy walked out of the medal of freedom ceremony in his own house. he just left the dude in his own office. isn't that guy the president now? that's how this works. maybe if it was a different president you might have been like wow, that must have been some national emergency. but he doesn't have anything to do. hannity starts in 20 minutes. got to get ready for hannity. hannity's on, i can't wait! for a dude who refuses to leave office, donald trump is awfully eager to leave his office. who knows, maybe that's how trump will concede. trump will get distracted and forget what he's doing and wanders off and biden forgets what he's doing and wanders in.
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peaceful transition of power. once again, the big story is the coronavirus pandemic. you know, it's the reason you give for why you haven't had sex in nine months. let's check out the latest news about the pandemic in another episode of keeping up with corona. ♪ ♪ let's begin with the united kingdom, america's estranged dad. today the u.k. began giving its people the vaccine. yeah. officially. starting with a 90-year-old woman, which is great for her. although, on the other hand, she's the only person in the whole country who is now safe to go out, so she's just going to be out hitting the club, like, whoo! where are all my party girls at? seriously, where is everybody? meanwhile, in the united states, it might take a little longer for everyone to get vaccinated because somebody, and i'm not saying which president, will, he done (~bleep~) up. >> with cases of covid surging
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across the country, we're learning millions of americans might have to wait months longer to receive a vaccine because the u.s. opted to get fewer doses from pfizer than it could have. the u.s. bought enough to vaccinate 50 million americans. by contrast the european union bought enough for 100 million people with an option to buy more. abc news confirms a "new york times" report that over the summer pfizer offered to sell the government additional doses but the trump administration turned them down. now biden says it might not be able to get the u.s. more doses until june of 2021. >> trevor: whoo! that's the art of the teal right there, baby. pfizer thought that you could pull a fast one on trump by offering to sell him life saving vaccines, and trump was, no deal. now europe is stuck with the vaccine and that means more corona for everybody here, baby! seriously, this may seem like a dumb decision by trump but you
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will realize it's a really (~bleep~) decision by trump. even with the vaccine, social distancing and wearing masks is still extremely important. that's why americans have to follow the government guidelines. i know americans are, like, this is government oppression, they're taking away my freedom. it's my right to take off mypaction makdz and marry my gun named mark. by i challenge your stereotypes? if americans think the rules in this country are too strict, americans need to see how social distancing is enforced in some other countries around the globe. for example, if you're upset because people give you dirty looks when you go outside without a mask, imagine if, instead oft that, the pleats pulled up in their cars and roasted you over the p.a. system because that's what's going on in south africa where videos like this one are going viral ( siren )
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>> trevor: yeah, that's right. in south africa, the police and the military are being tasked with enforcing the lockdown which is basically a recipe for disaster. in case you're wondering, yes, the south african version of law and order is a very different show. in the criminal justice system the people are represented by two separate yet equally important groups, the police who roast your ass hard and the district attorneys who stand behind them going, damn, son, he got you good -- these are their stories. interesting, that cop is africa's top hostage negotiator. look at yu with the funny
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haircut. looked like you (~bleep~) the lawn mower and lost. go home! as harsh as south africa's mask justice might seem what they do in rwanda could be worse. >> rwandans breaking curfew are sent to overnight long lectures about the dangers to have the virus. i was in the shop, my mask was on my chin, then the police found me in my shop and said you're not wearing your mask. then i got in the car and they told me they were taking me to a place to teach me to wear a mask. >> trevor: man, that is intense. rwandans are being forced to attend night school if they broke some covid rules. imagine that, if you don't like watching dr. fauci come on tv and ask you to wear a mask for 30 seconds, if you lived in are you wanda you would be forced to listen to dr. fauci all night in a cold stadium.
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the only thing that could be more boring if there's also a baseball game statement. you can use the kiss cam to test how much everyone learned. joseph, you are on the kiss cam. you must kiss. no! you must come back tomorrow night. i love how the guy pulled down the mask to show how he broke the rules by pulling down his mask. good thing it wasn't public decency. i was arrested for exposing myself like this and everyone was upset like now. for every american who's upset because they can't go to the gym to work out during covid, imagine you were forced to work out in front of your neighbors. >> india is in lockdown. the police have resorted to fiscal punishment for those who breach it. police are seen ordering locals to do squats and press-ups at the side to have the street.
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>> trevor: goddam, guys! that is humiliating and unnecessary. what happened to just shouting at people to wear a mask? forced exercise is so extreme! let me tell you something now, i would rather staple a mask on to my face than have to exercise in public. that's like all your grade school nightmares coming back to life. you couldn't be bother to wear a mask and now all your friends know you can't do five pushups? it's also good for people with no gym membership. pull down your mask and you get a personal trainer. people will be flying to india to take advantage to have the polls ysm my god, ten ray, what are you doing? you look amazing. let's just say i ignored a few rules in india. what does that even mean? we'll take a quick break. when we come back, ronny chieng will look back on the technology that made 2020 so amazing and
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busta rhymes is still joining us on the show, so stick around. tostitos avocado salsa. we put all of this in here... ...so you can put it on... ...well... just about anything. ♪ tostitos avocado salsa. get to the good stuff. a lotta folks are asking me lately how to get their dishes as clean as possible. avocado salsa. i tell them, you should try cascade platinum plus the power of oxi. cascade platinum + oxi breaks down food soils
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if you vape nicotine, you could be inhaling toxic metals like nickel, chromium, and lead that can damage your lungs. "the daily social distancing show." 2020 is almost over, and we can all agree that it has pretty much been a perfect year. i mean, did anything bad happen? no. i can't think of anything. and, so, for the rest of the month, we'll be remembering all of 2020's best moments. today ronny chieng takes a look back at the the year in technology. >> 2020 has been a year where people have depended on technology more than ever. i mean, i don't know how i would have made it living through the pandemic in 1918. what are you supposed to do back
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then while quarantining, read? gross! this is a gram aphone. music sucked back then, guys singing about how their sweetie loves apples or whatever. the biggest tech product of the year was zoom, and if it took a pandemic to get rid of skype, then i say worth it. skype was great if your goal was to not have a meeting, and some people complain zoom charges you for longer sessions. you know what? i say thank god. the only thing getting me through a call with my family is knowing there's a 45 minute escape hatch. i pay a premium for even shorter sessions. is there a five-minute plan zoom? if so, shut up and take my money. 2020 also brought us zoom terrorism. >> zoom, so many of us are using it to stay in touch, but now some are having major issues, as zoom meetings are getting hijacked in a new trend called zoom bombing.
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>> zoom bombings range from pranks to pornography. it even happened during a streaming news conference in which pornography popped up on screen as health authorities and officials discussed the pandemic. >> it seemed like people were checking in and quickly devolved into pornographic images being dumped as screen shots. >> of course zoom got hit with dick pics. each technology is a new way to send dick pics. you can see the one arm strong put on the moon. inspiring. 2020 also left was more free time to improve ourselves, like living a new language or baking your own bred. thankfully, video games were there to save us from all that crap. >> nintendo saw a boost in sales as more people need to be entertained at home because to have the pandemic. animal crossing, new horizons,
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26 million copies have been sold of this wildly popular game. >> yes, 2020 gave us the video game animal crossing which helped us create our own perfect world while the real world was going to shit. although we made the same mistakes in animal crossing that we did in real life. you start the game free and happy on an island, but three raccoons convince you to become a land developer. one things leads to another and my residents were not happy when i let b.p. start fracking on my island. but daddy's it go goth to get those turnips somehow. whoo. so technology did a lot of great things for 2020. like everything else, it got politicized. >> breaking news this morning, the trump administration announcing it will block downloads of chinese owned apps tiktok and wechat starting sunday. >> president trump tried to ban tiktok. i'm with trump. it's a horrible app. tiktok is more responsible for
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convincing white people they can dafnlts white people used to be ashamed to dance and now they all think they're jawawaukies. if trump was smart, he would just get on tiktok. a perfect showcase for how he dances. ( ymca playing ) this makes me want to follow the advice of injecting bleach but into my eyes. tech companies got the last laugh in 2020, while trump was trying to ban tiktok, facebook was trying to ban trump's bill shift. >> facebook deleted a post by the president that included a false statement about children and the virus. >> and twitter hit president trump with a warning label on up with of his tweets on vote by mail saying it violated the company's rules around elections. >> i'm glad they got around to fact chucking trump's new lies. but don't get credit for standing up to the president after five years.
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it's like beating up the rock after he's ninety. social media companies should have been fact checking trump earlier. he spread so much damaging false information over the years from saying obama is a secret muslim born in kenya to claiming meryl streep is overrated. she is the greatest living actress. i know all my good acting, after my critically acclaimed performance in crazy rich asians. shut up, twitter. main people say the greatest tech news this year is we have several vaccines in development that actually seem to work and, of course, we all know that people who need to get a vaccine first are the elderly. like my grandma, ronny etta chang. no, that does not a wig. i just take after her. give her the vaccine, preferably in her right arm because i'm left-handed. if the vaccines don't work out there's the option of an eject button on the planet.
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>> giant leap for elon musk on spacex, launched four astronauts into orbit. >> elon musk says he's highly confident he's going to put people on mars by 2026. the key, spacex's development of the star ship rocket, built to launch cargo and as many as 100 people at the same time to the moon and mars. >> yes, we will be able to travel to space which means i can finally add balls to arm strong' moon dick. everyone always forgets the balls. at least technology made it bearable. we made it through. it's almost 2021. things can only get better from here. damn it. >> trevor: thank you so much for that ronny. when we come back i'll talk about race with the best-selling author of the book so you want to talk about race. huh. that makes sense. and then busta rhymes will be joining us on the show. stick around.
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"the daily social distancing show." earlier today, i spoke with acclaimed writer ijeoma oluo. we talked about her new book examining white male supremacy in america and so much more. check it out. ijeoma oluo, welcome to "the daily social distancing show." >> thanks for having me. >> trevor: you wrote a book entitled "so you want to talk about race" in 2018. it was a hit. people loved it but i think it is fair to say that 2020 saw a resurgence of not just the book
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but the conversations of the book in a really interesting and unique way because of what the country was going through post-george floyd. what do you think it is about america that that book will stay consistent, unfortunately, for a while? >> you know, i think a lot of it is that people are very afraid to have honest conversations about race. it's been such a fraught, you know, subject. unfortunately, that means that people put it off unthe they feel like they can't anymore, especially white people. what happens then is something happens like the horrific killings of george floyd and breonna taylor and people realize, oh, we have to talk about. this and my book is one that talks about how to make that a little easier when people turn to it. it's sad because i want people to talk about this so we can move to action. this is one of the earlier steps is figuring out what's going on and talking about it. i would hope in 2020 we would be further along, but we're not, that's why i do the work. >> trevor: there's also no
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denying that your writing has made a lot of people feel uncomfortable, a lot of white people, a lot of white men in particular feel uncomfortable, and that was before your current book mediocre, which is about the dangers of white male immediate i don't care si. talk me through what that means. >> absolutely. so this was a book kind of written out of frustration. if you write on eissues of race and gender in america, especially since 2016, you see all these think pieces. you know, why is chad so angry, why is this white man so upset? and what i wanted people to look at was the political structure behind the time that we're in. i want people towns that this rise in, like, hate-filled, racist violent white male political ideology is by design and i want people to look at that because we have to change how we act and what we value as a society if we want to solve this problem, so that's really what we're looking at is a history in america of how we have actually made it beneficial
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or at least seem beneficial to white men to act like the only definition of success is power over women and people of color, and really what it's cost us over multiple generations. >> trevor: when you look at this conversation, though, i mean, obviously, there's so much resistance. a lot of white men are, like, i have nothing so how you say i have mediocrity or power that comes with it. i don't see the power. i live in west virginia. i have no money, i have barely any food. where is this white power you're speaking of. how do you try, if you even do, explain that to white people in those situations because sometimes i feel that will be the base that's riled up when they're told you have this privilege and positions and they don't see it. >> absolutely. it's important to recognize privilege is relative, right. so if you're an average everyday white man standing in a room with oprah winfrey, changes are in many areas she has more
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privilege than you. but if she is standing next to a white millionaire or billionaire, chances are she hasless privilege. it's situational depending on where you're at. but it's really important to recognize that white supremacy in this country is a pyramid scheme. it's the idea that you play along and you will have more. often it doesn't work out that way. that's part of why we see the anger is people bought into this system, they're playing along, they have been promised, they voted accordingly, they spent their money accordingly that their greatness is coming and when it doesn't who to they blame? often people like you and me because they're told you're supposed to be better off so a lot of the anger that says i don't have it ignores the fact that you probably weren't ever going to get it but you were promised that, and it becomes a political problem and it becomes part of the violence that often some white men end up supporting. >> there's no denying, as america becomes more and more diverse, the group of white men
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that we are talking about are going to become more and more resistant because they're going, oh, i'm losing my grip on, as you said, that promise of my place in america. so how do we get to a place where we invite people into the conversation without pandering but still invites people in going, like, oh, no, hey, this is for everybody's benefit. it's not about you losing and me winning, it's about everybody winning as opposed to buying into the pyramid scheme. >> it's definitely something i talk about in the book, the harm this does to men, the pay out that you're told is coming and it opportunity and the sense of failure when they buy into this. i personally am not writing to create kinder, genterrer white men. i'm writing because i am a black woman being harmed by this system and the way it works, but i do hear from white men who say you've named a thing i couldn't name, a disappointment, a constant yearning for more that i couldn't name.
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but i don't expect that, you know, a white man who's angry and, you know, is completely in a political opposite from me is going to pick up my book but what i do expect is people who know something is wrong is going to start looking at our values and system and changes it. then the white men who come up in the systems come up differently. the way that the power this violence has is lessened and that's my goal. >> trevor: 2020 was the hardest for everybody. for you feel i feel it was an extreme version. you had a fire that burned your home and everything you owned, you escaped only with the clothes on your back with your partner. the next day you got a call from your son saying he tested positive for covid 19 and in the midst of all of this, you're dealing with the death threats that you get and people calling s.w.a.t. teams to your house faking it and saying, oh, there's someone with a gun and trying to s.w.a.t. you. how do you process all that and exist in a state of not being
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perpetually enraged or terrified but also being a human being that writes and informs so many of us? >> i had to make peace with the fact that yes my work can make me a target in so many ways, but being a black woman in this country is make you a target no matter what. but at least i have a platform and i can tall it out and i believe we can change these systems. when you know these systems and they were built by people, if you believe in people, you have to believe we can change them, and i've seen evidence we can. yes, absolutely, it's a huge battle, but i believe in us, and i believe that black people are worth fighting for, i believe that people of color are worth fighting for, that women of color are worth fighting for. i love what we create, i love we're still here. i am a survivor like so many black women are. that gives me strength and i take strength in the fact i'm here and i can do this work and i absolutely believe that we can make real meaningful change to our systems that can improve our lives. >> trevor: i will say over and
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over again i am eternally grateful. everyone who reads your books is because they don't come from a place of hate but rather determination, of forcefulness where something needs to happen and you present the ideas and the solutions. so thank you for taking the time. thank you for writing another amazing book and hopefully we'll have you again on the show. >> thank you, it's a real pleasure. >> trevor: take care. "mediocre: the dangerous legacy of white male america" is available now. all right, stick around because when we come back busta rhymes joins us on the show.
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.>> trevor: welcome back to "the daily social distancing show." earlier today, i spoke with multi-platinum rap star busta rhymes. we talked about his prolific career and why we've waited 11 years for a brand-new album. what's going on busta bust? >> what's happening, brother? >> trevor: oh, man. a dream is what's happening now for me, man. thank you so much for joining us. welcome to "the daily social distancing show." >> thanks for having me. it's an honor and a pleasure and
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i'm a huge fan, brother. >> trevor: are you kidding me, man? all of the honor is mine. all of the pleasure is mine. you are one to have the greatest rappers of all time, you are, in my world, the greatest rapper of all time, and i'm excited to have you on because we're talking about your brand-new album "extinction level event 2". on a personal level, busta, why did we wait 11 years for a new album? 11 years i have been waiting! >> i think the first most important part of the delay was not so much the creative but more so me just making sure that i was comfortable with them that i was going to put this body of work in the hands of. i'm at a point in my life where
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having the blessed opportunity to be able to experience what many different support systems felt like. >> trevor: right. >> being able put albums out at six different record companies, i have been able to learn a lot as far as the difference between when your support system is right and when it's wrong. >> trevor: yeah, i feel you. >> and, you know, a lot has changed since the last album in 2009. so trying to navigate and see i was putting this body of work in the hands of the right people that were going to be deemed worthy to me and to the standards of what i know i deserve at this stage in my
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career and what this project deserves. >> trevor: what's been amazing has been seeing how you've maintained busta busta's flow and what makes you such a great rapper whilst at the same time changing what needs to be changed for the times that we're living in today because there's no denying, extension level event, man, there was a bounce and joy to it, every piece of it. we were keeping it coming, keeping it moving, ( trevor rapping ) you know what i mean? >> oh, wow! >> trevor: that's what we were doing, you know. that was 2009. then 2020 comes along and it's different. it's like it feels like -- it really feels like an extension level event now in a very different way and you rap about that. you know, you rapped about george floyd, you rapped about police bring tall and what's going on. talk me how busta rhymes went from the joy we know busta busta
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has and there's still joy in it, but still talking about the current moment people are experiencing. >> i think it's always important to be informative in the music. i think we have a duty and responsibility. at least the way i was raised, i was fortunate to get my grooming firsthand and my teaching firsthand on how to be a well-rounded artist from the likes of those guys. when we were doing it and when we were coming up, you know, being informative in the music was important, it was valued, it was a significant part of the way artists contributed to the culture and to the art and, you know, it was something that was done with grace and it was success that was garnished from being informative through your music. you know, it was a standard. it wasn't like you couldn't just come out and put out a bunch of nonsense and think that it was going to help establish
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credibility. you might have had a record that was nonsense and it might have been cool for a moment, but, you know, credibility has always been important to me. and it was also a key component to what validated you was a real artist in the eyes of the public, the consumer, and your other artists. >> trevor: you have the legends of hip-hop on this album. you have the q-tips and the rakeen. and then look over your shoulder kendrick lamar, and then on top of that michael jackson. i don't know how you did it but you isolated his lyrics from the jackson five. it's crystal clear almost like he's there in the studio with me. walk how that song came together. >> that was an incredible producer from virginia. i was going through music i
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never had an opportunity to get to and i footballly heard this track. he put it together in an amazing way and it blew my mind when eheard it, and i took the extra step in getting my hand on the actual original multi of the original recording of the song. kendrick heard it and, when he heard it, in a couple of days i got back the monster verse he put on this, and it was like, all right, we're sitting on a different type of gem with this piece. and once i heard his version, i heard the beat and just realized the way the blend felt with the michael jackson sample and kendrick's verse and the music and my verse, i was just, like, this is such a defining moment in this body of work. and interestingly, this record
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didn't get done until probably eight or nine years into the recording of the whole project. so it was kind of like a testament to how incredible, you know, patience can be if you understand how to appreciate patience. i kind of learned how to appreciate patience through the experience of work on the big bang album and i applied all that to this album and i'm super grateful. we were talking earlier why i took so long, i didn't necessarily choose to they can this long, but in the process of taking this long, i was able to get all of these magical moments on one body of work. >> trevor: everyone who's on it, every beat, every moment feels like it was curated. it feels like busta bust exploded. everyone who's waited so many years for extension level and finally got it. busta rhymes, thanks for joining
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me on the show. thank you, man. >> i salute you. keeping it going and growing my brother. >> trevor: thank you so much. "extinction level event 2: the wrath of god" is available now. we'll take a quick break but we'l go, don't forget to support your local restaurants. they are struggling to stay open during this pandemic, and if they don't get the help they need they might not be open for you when the pandemic is over. and if you want to help even more, please consider a donation
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to the james beard foundation's open for good campaign, which helps independent restaurants survive the pandemic and rebuild stronger and more equitably. until tomorrow -- stay safe out there, wear a mask, and if you don't wear a mask, you might want to practice your pushups. now, here it is -- your moment of zen. >> mr. kenyan is # 1 years old and i would like you to tell us how you came to get the vaccine this morning, how it happened. >> i rang up a hospital and they said we'll help because i couldn't find anywhere to park my car because i was late. i had a rather nasty lunch and came back and they were ready forker me. >> how do you feel you're one of the first people in the country to receive the first dose to have the vaccine? >> well there's no point dying now when i have lived this long, now when i have lived this long, is there?
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captioning made possible by comedy central - ♪ i'm going down to south park ♪ ♪ gonna have myself a time ♪ both: ♪ friendly faces everywhere ♪ ♪ humble folks without temptation ♪ - ♪ i'm going down to south park ♪ ♪ gonna leave my woes behind ♪ - ♪ ample parking day or night ♪ ♪ people spouting "howdy neighbor" ♪ - ♪ headin' on up to south park ♪ ♪ gonna see if i can't unwind ♪ - ♪ [muffled] ♪ - ♪ come on down to south park ♪ ♪ and meet some friends of mine ♪ ha. hey, tracee, you can't say no to a classic. girl, you know, wavy chips are way better for dippin'. ah. ♪crispy, airy, tasty poppables.♪ lay's. a little joy with every bag. introducing new extra charged coffee at dunkin'. because it's time for a little extra this year. extra boost. extra kick. extra being on. extra taking off. extra good to go. extra nonstop.
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